Mong nhận được feedback của các bạn. Some British families decide not to buy television because they influence the development of the creativity of children
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Since its appearance, television has been enjoyed by most of people from children to older people. It‘s a great source of information and entertainment. However, some British families believe that the exposure of children to television will prevent the development of their creativity. I totally agree with that idea.

It is not denied that programs for children on television are very interesting because they are presented by lively images and voice which books cannot do that.  However, as you know, when everything seems to be available, their brain will be in resting state. Meanwhile, when they read a book, they use their imaginary or stop for a moment to brainstorm ideas of next events. Those help stimulate children’s brain, especially creativity.

Moreover, children are easily addicted to television. Some stick their eyes on the screen all day long. This keeps them away from exploring new interesting outside world. It’s true that children can stay at home and watch a film about animals on farm, but if they spend time on the farm seeing  those animals in their own eyes, it help all parts of their brain become more active and creative. In addition, when children take part in outdoor activities, they will interact with other people or things. Sometimes, the outside world poses small challenges which children have to think how to deal with them. It also helps boost their creativity.

To sum up, television should be kept away from children and adults should encourage their children to explore real life so that they will be more creative.
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Your ideas are persuasive.

You just make a few small mistalks. Moving on

Since its appearance, television has been enjoyed by most of people from children to older people. It‘s a great source of information and entertainment. However, some British families believe that the exposure of children to television will prevent the development of their creativity. I totally agree with that idea.

It is not denied that programs for children on television are very interesting (children are very interested in programs on television) because they are presented by lively images and voice which books cannot do that.  However, as you know, when everything seems to be available, their brain will be in resting state. Meanwhile, when they read a book, they use their imaginary or stop for a moment to brainstorm ideas of next events. Those help stimulate children’s brain, especially creativity.

Moreover, children are easily addicted to television. Some stick their eyes on the screen all day long. This keeps them away from exploring new interesting things outside world. It’s true that children can stay at home and watch a film about animals on farm, but if they spend time on the farm seeing  those animals in their own eyes, it helps all parts of their brain become more active and creative. In addition, when children take part in outdoor activities, they will interact with other people or things. Sometimes, the outside world poses small challenges which children have to think how to deal with them. It also helps boost their creativity.

To sum up, television should be kept away from children and adults should encourage their children to explore real life so that they will be more creative.

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Since its appearance, television has been enjoyed by most of people from children to older people (  chỗ này ko sai về mặt ngữ pháp nhưng nghe rất lạ tai với mình: Nghĩ bạn nên sửa thành: Today, many people especially children have spents time watching TV because it is a great repository of knowledge and entertainment). It‘s (không nên viết tắt) a great source of information and entertainment. However, some British families believe that the exposure of children to television will prevent the development of their creativity. I totally agree with that idea.

It is not denied that programs for children on television are very interesting because they are presented by lively images and voice which books cannot do that.  However, as you know, (ko nên dùng as you know trong văn phong writing) when everything seems to be available, their brain will be in resting state. Meanwhile, when they read a book, they use their imaginary or stop for a moment to brainstorm ideas of next events. Those help stimulate children’s brain, especially creativity. ( Đoạn này viết bị lỗi organization, ko nêu bật đk ý chính và support cho ý của nó)

Moreover, children are easily addicted to television. Some stick their eyes on the screen all day long. This keeps them away from exploring new interesting outside world. It’s true that children can stay at home and watch a film about animals on farm, but if they spend time on the farm seeing  those animals in their own eyes, it help all parts of their brain become more active and creative. ( câu quá nhiều mệnh đề đọc rất loạn) In addition, when children take part in outdoor activities, they will interact with other people or things. Sometimes, the outside world poses small challenges which children have to think how to deal with them. It also helps boost their creativity.

To sum up, television should be kept away from children and adults should encourage their children to explore real life so that they will be more creative.
 

 

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51 points
0 votes
0 votes

Your ideas are persuasive.

You just make a few small mistalks. Moving on

Since its appearance, television has been enjoyed by most of people from children to older people. It‘s a great source of information and entertainment. However, some British families believe that the exposure of children to television will prevent the development of their creativity. I totally agree with that idea.

It is not denied that programs for children on television are very interesting (children are very interested in programs on television) because they are presented by lively images and voice which books cannot do that.  However, as you know, when everything seems to be available, their brain will be in resting state. Meanwhile, when they read a book, they use their imaginary or stop for a moment to brainstorm ideas of next events. Those help stimulate children’s brain, especially creativity.

Moreover, children are easily addicted to television. Some stick their eyes on the screen all day long. This keeps them away from exploring new interesting things outside world. It’s true that children can stay at home and watch a film about animals on farm, but if they spend time on the farm seeing  those animals in their own eyes, it helps all parts of their brain become more active and creative. In addition, when children take part in outdoor activities, they will interact with other people or things. Sometimes, the outside world poses small challenges which children have to think how to deal with them. It also helps boost their creativity.

To sum up, television should be kept away from children and adults should encourage their children to explore real life so that they will be more creative.

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217 points

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