Household car ownership in B

Question

 

The line graph illustrates data on how much car commuter in Britain over a period of 40 years starting from 1990

 

It is clear that while the percentage of people using more than one car increase significantly, the opposite is true for no-car household. Also, there is a slight rise in the proportion of people owning only one car during the period

 

In 1990, people no using car accounted foe the largest with over 50%. Compared with nearly 35% and 11% human commuting one and over cars respectively. Over the next 15 years, one car household peaked at over 56%. By contrast, traveling more than one car witnessed a lowest point of under 10%. At the same time, the proportion of no-car commuter fell down by approximately 17%

 

In 2030, human owning more than one car is anticipated to grow up about over 40%. A fluctuation that people using one car is expected before reaching to the same percentage which more cars accounting. Meanwhile, a decline in the amount of no car is predicted just 15% at the end time

 

Answer 1

The line graph illustrates data on how much car commuter in Britain over a period of 40 years starting from 1990[W1]

It is clear that while the percentage of people using more than one car increase[W2]  significantly, the opposite is[W3]  true for no-car household. Also, there is [W4] a slight rise in the proportion of people owning only one car during the period

In 1990, people no using car[W5]  accounted foe[W6]  the largest with over 50%. Compared[W7]  with nearly 35% and 11% human commuting one and over cars respectively. Over the next 15 years, one car household [W8] peaked at over 56%. By contrast, traveling more than one car [W9] witnessed a lowest point of under 10%. At the same time, the proportion of no-car commuter[W10]  fell down by approximately 17%

In 2030, human owning more than one car [W11] is anticipated to grow up about over 40%. A fluctuation that people using one car is expected before reaching to the same percentage which more cars accounting. Meanwhile, a decline in the amount of no car is predicted just 15% at the end time

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 [W1]Redundant word.

 [W2]Grammar error: 1971-2007 hence increase + ed.

 [W3]Grammar error: Was.

 [W4]Grammar error: Was.

 [W5]Idea suggestion: Households have no car, which accounted.

 [W6]Spelling error: For.

 [W7]Grammar error: In academic writing, do not use verb at beginning.

 [W8]Idea suggestion: The percentage of household using one car.

 [W9]Vocabulary error:  Households having/using more than one car witnessed .

 [W10]Grammar error: It is plural noun, => Car commuters.

 [W11]Vocabulary error: The percentage of household  possessed one car, which increased to over 40%.

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CRITERIA	GRADE	COMMENT
Task Response	4	• attempts to address the task but does not cover all key features/bullet points; the format may be inappropriate • (GT) fails to clearly explain the purpose of the letter; the tone may be inappropriate • may confuse key features/bullet points with detail; parts may be unclear, irrelevant, repetitive or inaccurate
Coherence and Cohesion	4	• presents information and ideas but these are not arranged coherently and there is no clear progression in the response • uses some basic cohesive devices but these may be inaccurate or repetitive
Lexical Resource	4	• uses only basic vocabulary which may be used repetitively or which may be inappropriate for the task • has limited control of word formation and/or spelling; • errors may cause strain for the reader
Grammatical Range and Accuracy	4	• uses only a very limited range of structures with only rare use of subordinate clauses • some structures are accurate but errors predominate, and punctuation is often faulty
Overall	4.0

 

 

 

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