Đề thi IELTS - 29/01/2015 - It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environment, such as South pole...
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Topic IELTS của tuần này  29/01/2015:

It is now possible for scientists and tourists to travel to remote natural environment, such as South pole.

Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

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Bài mẫu Band 8.0 cho đề Task 2 tuần này: 29/01/2015 đến từ IPP IELTS

With advanced technology, missions to undiscovered habitats are no longer impossible for both scientists and tourists. While promoting exploration to such areas has its attractiveness, I believe the associated shortcomings are far more severe.

 

One the one hand, the idea of bringing more people to remote locations is well received by many advocates for a number of reasons. First, some people may regard expedition voyages to untouched areas as exquisite adventures. As the tourism industry expands to these potential destinations, new jobs can be created and economic benefits can be derived. Furthermore, with the aid of modern means of transport, geologists may now approach the previously inaccessible sites, some of which can be fossil fuel deposits. This is increasingly significant to human kind, as the majority of the current fossil fuel sources have been overexploited and there can be a global energy scarcity in the near future.

 

On the other hand, substantial disadvantages are apparent because the burgeoning of tourism and geological research may heavily disturb the flora and fauna of the remotely located places. This is due to the unlikeliness that tourist ships bring waste back to the departure point, and that there is no waste treatment plant in the South Pole. In addition, the work of geologists involves the analysis of ice-shelves hundreds of metres thick, and the drilling for and the hauling of oil and gas afterwards. These activities, along with the cumulative tourist waste, may consequently have a disastrous effect on the natural habitats. As a result, what used to be a pristine land can eventually be polluted.

 

In conclusion, the permission for travellers to secluded places will create favourable conditions for not only researchers but also normal travellers. Nevertheless, in my opinion, the drawbacks it brings to the ecosystem is insurmountable, far outweighing the aforementioned benefits.

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Some people hold the view that the remote natural areas which are often accessed by only scientists due to their rigorous condition should be opened for tourists as well. In my opinion, there is no doubt to cash on their benefits on tourism, however, It also have adverse effects on not only eco-system but also the safety of themselves.

To begin with, there are several advantages when permitting tourist travel to remote natural environment. First of all, the tourism would have an opportunity to develop to a different level. The fact is that the remote environment is still the mystery for many people. Therefore, it could attract a huge number of visitors who love adventuring and discovering of the secrets of earths, as the result, it brings lots of benefit for tourism. Moreover, the increasing of travelers to dangerous regions also stimulates development of other support services such as rescue, tour guides and carriers, which would open lots of employment opportunities for labor market. Besides, the infrastructures like hotels, restaurants which rarely exist in those areas would be built to provide services for tourists. Also, it enriches the life of professionals who do researches here.

On the other hand, the appearance of tourist in the remote natural area is believed to be harmful for ecosystem and risky. It’s clear that the misbehaviors of travelers like littering and hunting animals have lots of drawbacks to the wild life and natural landscapes. Moreover, the remote natural areas such as South and North pole, have been well-known with the vigorous weather conditions, therefore, it have high risk potential for travelers who are lost the way or faced to unpredicted situation such as snow storm or avalanche.

In conclusion, the permissions for travelers exploring remote natural environment will bring lots benefits to tourism, although it also have drawbacks to environment as well. However, in my opinion, its adverse effects could be minority in comparison with its benefits if the is a suitable management from travel companies and government to raise awareness of visitors on protecting environment as well as keep themselves from potential risks
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Mình thấy không phải là lạc đề chút ít đâu mà bị lạc hoàn toàn í. Chỉ cần hiểu khác đi thì nguyên phần disadvantage của bạn xem như không dùng được, bởi vì đề bài đâu có nói là scientists and tourist travel "together"? bạn đâu thể mặc định vậy được. Mình nghĩ tốt nhất bạn nên viết lại thì mọi người mới góp ý chính xác được.
thanks bạn, mình sẽ sửa. :'(
mình đã sửa nhé. ^^
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With the development of science technology, the routine to special natural lands such as the south and north poles is not impossible for scientists and travelers. I believe that bringing people to such areas has both advantages and disadvantages. Both sides of view will be disscussed before a resonable conclusion is given.

On the one hand, there will be  many benefits as we encourage reseachers and tourists to the area like the south pole. Firstly, the trips are the benificial adventure for scientists understanding more about the earth. By analyzing the level of snow and the atmosphere inside the air, the reseachers will have more evident about global warming to prove that our earth are in a dengerous situation of warming globally. Secondly, it will be an effective factor to stimulate the development of tourism industry in these areas. For example, with a easier flight to the south pole, more and more back-packing men will travel to this location, and in return it will rise others public services such as accommodation providing, etc. From these reasons, it is clear that developing the route to remote natural environment will have many advantages.

On the other hand, it also will bring to lots of drawbacks to remote natural lands. First of all, it is likely to damage the environment of the area totally as too many scientist or tourists coming there. For instance, the amount of waste will be increased rapidly when those people come and leave continueously, because there is no recyling waste factories around the area such as the south or north pole. In addition, travelling people from main land to those locations will be more danger than normal flights. From above causes, there is no dout that the disadvantages of travelling to remote natural environment can be seen.

After analyzing the pros and cons of adventuring to remote natural locations, i believe that the advantage outweighs the disadvantage. It is recommended that the flight to such environment should be encouraged more in the foreseeable future.
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encourage reseachers and tourists to the => encourage to V
have more evident => evident là tính từ
Bạn dùng nhiều từ informal như more and more, lots of
Diễn đạt nhiều chỗ hơi dài dòng, lủng củng, nên nói cho gọn ý
"the trips are the benificial adventure for scientists understanding more about the earth" -> the trips are beneficial for scientists to understand more about the Earth"
"reseachers will have more evident about global warming to prove that our earth are in a dengerous situation of warming globally" ---> researchers will have more evidence about global warming in order to prove that our Earth is in a dangerous situation (bạn nói global warming ở vế trước rồi không cần nói vế sau nữa).
" it will be an effective factor to stimulate" ---> it will be an effective stimulator
"with a easier flight" --> with easier flights (an easier for singular)
"and in return" ---> as a result (clearer)
 "it will rise others public services such as accommodation providing" ---> it will provide favorable conditions for other public services' growth (rise dùng không đúng ở đây)
" it is clear that developing the route to remote natural environment will have many advantages." --> developing routes (general statement)
"damage the environment of the area totally" ---> nên bỏ từ totally
"as too many scientist or tourists coming there. " ---> come
"there is no recyling waste factories" ---> are
"travelling people from main land to those locations will be more danger than normal flights" --> flying people from main land to such locations will be more dangerous (không phải travelling people với danger nha bạn)
"From above causes" ---> from all the reasons above(causes không có chính xác)
"It is recommended that" ---> I believe that (who recommends??)
Thank u very much!
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It is true that people these days have more opportunities to explore faraway areas in which humans hardly ever live. While I accept that this sometimes has harmful impacts on the scientists and travelers, I believe that it is more likely to have positive effects.

On the one hand, a journey to distant natural environment is definitely beneficial for both scientists and tourists. Primarily, voyagers with a view to doing science activities can discover new knowledge about geology, biology and zoology when reaching remote places on earth such as South Pole or Amazon rainforest. For instance, owning to South Pole expeditions executed by scientists from many different countries, human in today’s world are knowledgeable about its severe weather condition, wildlife species and natural resources like coal, oil and gas that Antarctica possesses. Furthermore, as a result of the higher standard of living, it is insufficient for people to travel to ordinary destinations. By exploring mysterious places, they can satisfy their hunger for conquest and get extraordinary experiences that not many people can gain in life.

However, I would argue that several drawbacks of this development should not be overlooked. The main shortcoming is the peril of the journey. It is undoubtedly seen that the more inaccessible the areas are, the more hazard travelers have to encounter. Those dangers may come from a wide range of factors such as harsh weather, food and water shortage and wildlife attacks. For example, Mount Everest, which has attracted thousands of climbers each year, always has those who are injured or dead on the way conquering the roof of the world. Another downside is that the expeditions are often costly, which put a financial burden on governments in the hope of enhancing scientific discovery. It can be argued that those national budgets may be used to invest in other important sectors such as education and health care, which leads to a stable development.

In conclusion, despite several disadvantages, the potential benefits of exploring faraway lands should be acknowledged.
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4 points
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The advancement of technology has opened the possibilities for traveling to distant extreme climate environments such as  South Pole. While there are a broad array of benefits and drawbacks involved in this type of travel, I would argue that the disadvantages may be greater.

On the one hand, it is beyond dispute that going to far-off lands might help scientists research untapped areas to understand deeply our planet. In addition, researchers may investigate carefully the regions and then begin to extract or deploy the natural resources there such as copper or gold mineral deposits in favour of their country benefits. Also noticeable is the fact that traveling to remote natural places has recently become an official tourism. In reality, for people who are usually bored with going sightseeing or sailing up the rivers, taking a trip to South Pole certainly entertains them greater.

However, it would be a mistake to overlook the drawbacks of this type of traveling. Firstly, the investigation of scientist would probably change the original condition of remote areas. The lost of habitats for the polar bears reported on Discovery Chanel may be a case in point. As for tourists, it is obvious that traveling to remote natural areas are just the sorts of entertainment for a small number of rich people, not for everyone. For instance, going on a trip to South Pole may be exciting but it only satisfies the need of a few millionares.

In conclusion, more and more nations nowdays are taking part in exploring and exploiting the remote natural lands because of their potential benefits. However, as regard the whole society, the disadvantages actually overtake the advantages.

Word count:  275
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The development of transportation and technology has enabled us to conquer many natural areas where we could not reach before. This phenomenon has created several merits and demerits. However, I postulate that we can gain more benefits from this development.

In one hand, this development might have some glaring drawbacks. It is a cogent idea that travelling to remote natural places can deteriorate the environmental structure of these areas. We cannot deny that the appearance of a lot of climbers conquering Everest Mount has a negative impact on the beauty and the natural environment here. Thousands tonnes of garbage have been dispensed on the way reaching the mount every day, which pollutes the area seriously. The lives of citizens in these places  is also influenced by the new lifestyle of travelers from other countries. This change can be the reason for the disappearance of some culture in the world.

However, approaching remote natural environment can bring about more  benefit s. This can help human being have a deeper understanding on the development of the galaxy or the way that the earth was formed. With this new discovery,  the scientists can explain and come up with several measures to control some acute environmental disasters. Taking an example, The scientists now can easily reach two poles to research on the glaciers to record and warn the world about the global warming. Moreover,  Traveling to difficult- to-reach areas is an attractive business. More and more tourists are now  willing to spend a large amount of money to have a day enjoying the life in the south Pole . There are more jobs created for the indigenous citizens and the country owning that environment also receives more revenue from the tourists.  

In conclusion, I believe that traveling to remote or mountainous areas is an manifest trend for not only the tourism but the researching as well. Nevertheless, we have to aware that discovering these places is a way to help us understand our precious world not to destroy our mutual home.
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Hi Tuấn, bài của bạn mắc nhiều lỗi cơ bản, ở cả 4 tiêu chí chấm điểm của IELTS.

Bạn có thể follow link này để xem bài chữa cụ thể!

http://scholarshipplanet.info/check/2343/de-ielts-hang-tuan-ngay-29-1-2015-bai-discursive-essay-band-5-0-cua-ban-tuanmox
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It is undeniable that remote natural environment no longer be inaccessible, thanks to technological advance. Some people, however, argue that this practice has more disadvantages than advantages. I oppose to their view for several reasons below.

First, travelling to remote natural environment leads to many scientific discoveries. When exploring South Pole, scientists find  that there is a large hole upon the Ozone layer. It let them know how serious the environmental pollution has been. Trips to Amazon tropical rain forest, on the other hand, provide biologists with more know-how of ecological system. There is a great variety of creatures along the river bank and we know little about them. It is likely that scientists come across traces of ancient cities dating back to prehistoric era deeply inside Amazon forest.

Second, its bring about remarkable changes in tourism. People are so familiar with common tourist attractions that they tend to search for natural anomalies. Trips to faraway destinations are of great interest, which not only renew their experiences but also direct them to an entirely new way of thinking. In distant future, the outlook of visiting the Sun, and even inhabitting on Mars wil probably come true.

Those who object to this kind of traveling assume that natural environment will be totally destroyed. What remains primative  on Earth run the risk of being commercialised. Infrastructure is built up in order to attract visitors. Visitors with little responsibility kill animals and throw rubbish into the environment. However, I think that these prolems will be erased right from the start by bringing in laws against environmental destructive actions and more importantly, encouraging people to detect and denounce.

In short, traveling to remote natural destinations will be advantageous if administed well. Protecting environment is not a private matter, but a public responsibility.
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Mình thầy bạn nhiều chỗ chia động từ chưa chuẩn, sai chính tả khá nhiều.

1) the natural environment is no longer inaccessible chứ không phải như bạn viết.
2) một số từ như "administered", hoặc the natural environment theo mình không nên dùng "totally destroyed" mà nên dùng trạng từ khác nghĩa nhẹ hơn
Cảm ơn bạn. Bạn có thể liệt kê giúp mình các từ bạn nghĩ là sai chính tả và ngữ pháp không để mình sửa? Mình xin đính chính chút: theo mình  thì cấu trúc it is adj+ that+ s + v bare bạn ạ. Ví dụ: it is necessary that the document be submitted before deadline.
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With the advances in modern technology, scientists and tourists are now able to reach distant destinations, the South Pole, for example. In my opinion, I believe that this development has more disadvantages than advantages.

Some environmentalists are horrified at the idea of tourist invasion in such pristine places because people's ignorance can cause serious harm to the endemic animals there. With tourists normally comes vandalism; tourists may throw rubbish irresponsibly, causing the animals considerable harm. For example, a polar bear in North Pole recently met its death due to its swallowing a plastic bottle, presumably left behind by a tourist.

Secondly, scientist expeditions may be in fact just a cover for the nations’ true scheme- a race to claim natural resources. For example, in 2013, Russia sent a number of icebreakers on the expedition to North Pole, in the name of scientific research. Their true ambition, however, was to claim a large swath of the Arctic, which is believed to contain vast reserves of untapped oil and gas. The extent of damage caused by human extraction activities is unimaginable. All the drilling will melt the ice at even a faster rate than that caused by global warming.

Admittedly, the development has some advantages as well. One of which is the important scientific discovery made on expeditions. Due to its sub zero conditions, the activities of bacteria and microorganism are almost non-existent, creating an ideal medium for preservation. A remarkably intact frozen baby mammoth carcass from 39000 years ago was excavated from Siberia in 2013, providing an unprecedented chance to study this extinct species.

In conclusion, though there is the advantage of science discoveries made in the new development, the disadvantages caused by tourist ignorance and the race for untapped resources far eclipse the benefits.
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Hi nickyng, anh có dẫn chứng của cả Dominic Cole và Simon về vấn đề này. Một số vấn đề có thể gây tranh cãi ngay trong cộng đồng experts về IELTS, nên cũng không khó hiểu nếu thầy Ryan có cái nhìn khác.
Anh ơi vậy nếu vấn đề vẫn còn đang tranh cãi thì có thể hiểu là đưa dẫn chứng cụ thể hay nói chung đều được chấp nhận đúng không?
Anh hơi bảo thủ tí, nên cho rằng, "không", vì mặc nhiên vào phòng thi không thể để học sinh của mình, hoặc những bạn mình chữa bài cho, mạo hiểm 50-50 được.Cứ hướng về những cái đúng và được thừa nhận trong cả cộng đồng thì an toàn hơn. Ai mà biết ông examiner theo hướng nào?
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Rất mong các bạn đọc bài mình và cho ý kiến :D. và cho mình biết bài viết của mình cỡ được band bao nhiêu :)

It is true that with the advance of technology, the world has had the capability to send people to remote natural environment for scientific research and travelling. While I believe that this has some drawbacks, I think the benefits are far more significant.

On the one hand, there are many advantages of sending researchers and travellers to faraway natural habitats such as Amazon forest and the South Pole. Firstly, new scientific research and exploration can be carried out, which is beneficial for expanding human knowledge. Scientists in Antarctica, for example, have been able to examine the impacts of exhaust gas and fumes on the Ozone layer. Also, they may be able to find a way to save polar bears from global warming. Secondly, there are many mysteries out there in remote areas that need to be uncovered. Finally, a new kind of tourism can be formed, which helps public gain more understanding about such places.

On the other hand, having people travelling to these places can have many drawbacks. First, in order for scientific research to be conducted, funding from governments should be allocated to build facilities and buy experimental equipment. This might require a large amount of investment and people might argue whether the money should be spent on improving public services such as health care and education. Another factor is that allowing people to live in natural environment can lead to the deterioration in habitats. For example, constructing accommodation for tourists and scientists may adversely affect living conditions of local animals such as polar bears. Finally, it has been known that many people come to the South Pole to hunt seals. If there are more people travelling to the pole, more seals will suffer.

In conclusion, I would argue the benefits of this trend outweigh the disadvantages if it is carried out with care given to local animals and their natural habitats.

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"to save polar bears from global warming" theo mình chưa đúng lắm, nên là "save from...extinction" hoặc "protect from..." chứ global warming chưa thể ngay lập lức làm polar bears bị biến mất
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It should be acknowledged that advances in technology make it possible for people to go to natural places that had been inaccessible in the past. While this improvement is welcomed by quite a few people, others are grappling with the question of whether it is a positive or negative development. While the accessibility of distant areas will certainly bring about some good effects, its drawbacks should not be underestimated.

On the one hand, possible trips to far remote area has been enthusiastically greeted by not a few people, scientists and tourists alike. First and foremost, it represents significant breakthroughs yielded in the field of science and technology. Previously, travelling to such areas as the South Pole was considered impossible owing to their remoteness, harsh conditions there. These advances may facilitate further discoveries in science and technology which are certain to provide us with considerable benefits. Better still, this development is believed to exert ripple, beneficial impact on other fields such as the tourism industry in particular and the economy in general. Travelling to distant original places would boost feeble demand in the tourism industry – which has been adversely affected by the recent global economic recession, thus generating more jobs and contributing to the overall growth of the economy. Last but not least, people may uncover new natural resources useful for our life.

However, everything has its two coins/sides and this phenomenon is no exception. While it may stimulate demand in the tourism industry, it might also have other detrimental effects on the natural environment. Ever higher demand for travelling will absolutely lead to more and more people going to these places which could have undesirable effects such as emissions into the environment. On top of that, over extraction of natural resources in these original areas poses significant challenges. Not only will it make the bad situation (in environmental pollution) even worse, damages to animals’ habitats run the risks of causing some animals to be extinct (for example, the Polar Bear).  These reasons explain why an increasing number of people have voiced their opposition to this nascent industry.

In conclusion, trips to remote places have their pros and cons. Scientific and business circles are strongly advised to take these advantages and disadvantages into thorough consideration before making any decision to promote travelling and any other activities there.
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The development of technology has now offered possibility for scientists and travelers of visiting distant areas of nature. In spite of the drawbacks, such kinds of traveling bring about much greater advantages.

In the view of science, remote natural environment is habitat of various endangered species which are still undiscovered. Nature professionals aim at discovery of those species and protection of them against extinction. By embarking on adventures to the wild world, scientists could ease their method of approaching the wild, in lieu of observing through modern devices.

Moreover, ordinary visitors require more extraordinary journey. Spending time on a beach or in a resort with comfortable services is no longer a tendency. Tourism now offers several nature tours with developed equipment which can prevent their tourists from dangerous situation. Therefore, more and more people participate in such trips to satisfy their curiosity.  

However, unexpected circumstances could not always be preventive. The adventure might lead to danger because of either wild animals or the harshness of the environment. For instance, the cold of South Pole or the fluctuation in temperature at desserts can put to considerable inconvenience. Furthermore, some tourists are wounded by natural traps or attacked by the animals.

In conclusion, advanced technology could reduce the risk of such tours so that travelers have an opportunity to participate in without considering the danger. The trips are advantageous enough for scientists and tourists to ignore the weaknesses.
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