Chữa IELTS Writing with Mysheo - Chữa bài trực tiếp vào tối thứ tư ngày 22/07

Question

Đây là topic được lập ra để các bạn submit bài của mình lên. Sau đó,vào tối ngày 22/07 sắp tới,chúng mình sẽ tổ chức một buổi dạy ielts online, trong đó,chị Mysheo sẽ chọn ra ngẫu nhiên một số bài viết của các bạn để chữa bài 

Và đây là TOPIC ielts writing task 2 các bạn cùng tham gia:

 

Advertising discourages people from being different individuals by making us want to be and to look the same.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

 

Answer 1

Advertisements are among the most effective means by which manufacturers publicise their products. Some people, however, denounce the advertising industry. They contend that it expunges the distinction among people. I agree with this opinion for several reasons enumerated below.

 

Firstly, ideal images and models are made pervasive in forms of advertising, exhorting people to follow. The young nowadays subscibe to their idols on multimedia. This elucidates why they are the ones who highly imitate the same models, and therefore follow the same styles, same manners, and look like each others. Aesthetical values are venerated by everyone. It is reasonable that we orient towards what we suppose beauties, and advertisements are merely means of transporting these things to people.

 

Seconly, it is incontrovertible that people want to catch up with latest style and fashion. These common trend are popularised by advertisements. Neither do ones want to be eccentric, nor be out-of-date. They also detest being surpassed by others. That means, they tend to buy what others have, which will soon turn into a common wave.

 

Nevertheless, some people chase idividualism. They show off their own personalities by possessing unique styles. For example, the fashionistas often update latest news about fashion. They are unreluctant to immediately purchase Valentino’s exclusive summer collections. These people are minor, however, because of financial conditions

Answer 2

The question of whether commercials have caused humans to be less unique is of controversial views. In my personal point of view, I partially agree with this statement for several reasons. In this essay, I will give reasons and examples in support of my opinion.

Perhaps the most important point for advocates is that all people regardless of adults or children want to keep themselves up-to-date with the current trends. A good example of this is how people buy a new phone. It is likely that most would like to own the latest version of an IPhone or a Samsung Galaxy. What is more, Vietnamese schoolgirls nowadays have a tendency to listen to and be crazy about Korean Pop Music. I personally believe that if one does not, many of her friends will consider her as a weirdo.

Nonetheless, there are several reasons that make many people and I argue against this belief. On the one hand, human beings have their own opinion as well as their rights to pick up items that are perfectly suitable for them. Take fashion clothes as an example. There is a variety of pieces of clothes that are in different colors and styles to choose from such as dresses, pants, shirts or skirts. Additionally, as far as finance is concerned, individuals have to consider carefully before spending their budget. For example, a collar-worker with a limited salary of $300 per month is not able to go travelling to different parts of the world as regularly as his friends do.

 

In conclusion, while it is true that advertising partly accounts for similarities between humans, I agree that there are some convincing reasons for sceptic as aforementioned.