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Question

Đề: Studying abroad can be highly motivational for students and also inspire their dreams. However, whilst studying abroad can have a number of positive effects on students, there are also many difficulties that they may meet along the way. With this in mind, it is more advantages to study at home.

To what extend do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer.

 

 

These days, many people believe that despite the benefits of studying abroad, the drawbacks stand out. They think that students will have to face lots of problems and difficulties, so studying at home is still better. Personally, while I agree that sometimes international students will find it is too dangerous to take the risk and go abroad to study, I believe that coming to another country to study creates a great motivation and inspires students' dreams.

 

On the one hand, I agree there are a lot of factors that make students feel tired and desperated. Firstly, the biggest problem is obviously the fiance. Needless to say, in som countries such as the UK, overseas students have to pay a lot more than home students and some will not be able to afford those money. Secondly, communication also becomes a significant difficulty which most foreign students have to face. Not every students master the language of the country they are going to, they may find it hard to use an unfamiliar language every day as their tounge language.

 

On the other hand, I believe that studying abroad broadens students' knowledge. They are given an opportunity to experience new culture and get to know the people in the area. Furthermore, in that time, students can learn how to be independent. They live in a total new place alone, so they will have to earn money themselves for their personal's payments and they wil also learn to adjust their ways of spending money.

 

In conclusion, while facing a lot of difficulties makes students desperated, I believe all the advantages that studying abroad brought, it is worth to take a risk and live with our dreams.

Answer 1

you has better impress the examiner as the first sight, when i begin to read, i guess it about 5.0. In fact, it is after i finish reading. you have too much grammar mistakes to get it over brand 5.

generally, the examiner will know the essay he is reading get how much scores only by introduction??? it is not academic, so long, poor lexical resouce. you much learn how to make an attractive overall.

Answer 2

Theo như mình được học và đọc qua, thì không nên viết bài mà để chủ ngữ I hay we, mà nên thay bằng các chủ ngữ chỉ ý chung chung khác để viết :)

Answer 3

Theo mình, bạn nên lập luận nhiều hơn ở body 2, vì đó là ý kiến bạn thiên về. Đừng khai thác quá nhiều phần bạn ít ủng hộ (body 1), trừ khi bạn khai thác đồng thời nêu một số mặt trái của nó (nhưng không quá phê phán, vì đây không phải dạng agree/disagree rõ ràng) và xây dựng một body 2 vững. Cố gắng dành vài phút kiểm tra lỗi chính tả nhé.

Thân!

Answer 4

in your writing, I see have wrong words. In addtion, the drawback of studying oversea is the problem of paper work, language banner, home sick and so on, whereas it opens the door of good future namely good job, perfect working environment... ^ ^

Answer 5

This is my writing about this phenomenon. Help me gauge about this, please.

Resently, studying oversea is becoming a trend of young generation because they keep thier dogma that they can reach prinnacles of career thanks to the benefits of it. However, some people think it still has a variety of drawbacks to students. Personally, i will give both sides after gauging about it.

We are conspicuous that studying abroad bring a number of advantage to students. Firstly, students have many opportunity to experience the life in countries which have different culture in comparison with their culture. For example, in some western countries, citizens usually wear red clothes to wish that the lucky things will come with them. And this spawn the interesting to foreign students. Secondly, studying oversea will open the reservoir of knowledge which is a main reason of many students. Many foreign students get zenith of galory after long stretched of time they learn in countries namely USA, Singapore and so on. Lastly, with degrees of development countries, students is easy to find good job with high salary.

On the other hand, foreign students have to face with adversities when they learn in other countries. For instance, they deal with the difficult paper work namely visa. In addition, language banner is another difficulty which trigger neglecting this dream in students. Furthemore, financial problem perhaps is the most hard to resolve if students want to study oversea.

To put it in a nutshell, i pen down saying that studying oversea possess advantages and disadvantages alike but i think its benefit still outweigh the other side.

Comments

I can't give your essay a close examination at the moment but here are a few words of advice: try simpler words. Using advanced vocabulary will only do you good if only you have a complete understanding of the words, both their meaning and the context where they are used. Otherwise, it backfires.

Answer 6

Your introduction is too long, I think 2 sentences is enough.

In my view, you used some informal words so that your essay is not really academic :)

For example, needness to say,....

Answer 7

Your introduction is too long, I think 2 sentences will be fine so that you will have more time for body paragraphs which take more marks. In the introduction, you support the idea of going abroad for study, so you should generate more ideas and opinions for the second body paragraph than the first one which shows disadvantages of overseas study.

Answer 8

in your writing, I see have wrong words. In addtion, the drawback of studying oversea is the problem of paper work, language banner, home sick and so on, whereas it opens the door of good future namely good job, perfect working environment.