In current times, as environmental problems are the rising issues (chị thấy k nên để cả problems với issue chung một clause, nó khiến câu mở hơi mông lung, em có thể sửa là ...are on the rise nhé) , some people claim that government and large companies (mình kiếm snynonym nhé, thế này là lặp lại rùi ) should take responsible of (sai rùi nè) protecting surrounding environment. Personally, I disagree with the above viewpoint, and also (mình nên viết instead or sth sang hơn) believe that both individuals and the government have to enhance (chị thấy chưa sát nghĩa nè) the environment together.
To begin with, people in society need to be constantly concerned the awareness (thừa quá, thay câu nhé) of taking care and paying attention to the environment. Especially city dwellers, who are likely to behave badly towards trees, flowers, mountains and atmosphere on a regular and long-term basis. Walking through the streets outside (thừa), we will see trash littering carelessly, as well as the exhaust fumes and the excessive emission of carbon dioxide from busy means of transports moving on the roads. As a result, the difference of a greener environment originates in taking actions of residents, as we are now being affected in the public environment. (nghĩa chưa rõ, khá "việt" Folks must be conscious and start doing nice things such as plant trees, stop consuming plastic bags, cycling, propagate others (tại sao có lúc dùng V, lúc dùng V-ing tùm lum thế này?), and so on. Little by little, human beings can create a tremeduous difference, which bring them better quality of life and provide mental benefits for themselves.
Nevertheless, in order to be even more effectively, big corporations and government should also participate in this task. Strict laws, punishments as well as good education have to be proceeded from government's actions. Specifically speaking, regarding children, it is significant to take the environment into curriculum and completely guide them how to treat it right. Moreover, companies should establish campaigns or movements for employees to understand the importance of environment, as well as for those who are still have no idea about defending a green of the Earth.
In summary, I am of opinion that the government and people have to tackle the environmental issues together so that they would be able to acquire a better life and decrease the risk of health-damaging diseases.
Overall, chị thấy bài này em mắc kha khá lỗi đó, and một lần nữa chưa thực sự convincing. Em check lại rồi viết lại nhé.
Chúc em học tốt!