Essay about Technology: Some people say that technology has made our life worse? What do you think?
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Technology refers to methods, systems, and devices which are the result of scientific knowledge being used for practical purposes. Since the evolution of technology in the early 21st Century, our human’s life has been changing dramatically in both positive and negative ways. In the last few years, there’s been appearing a myriad drawbacks of technology such as increasing loneliness and unemployment rates, reducing people’s security. Those problems have raised a question about whether or not technology has made our life worse among some people. This intriguing question encouraged me to present both its benefits and drawbacks and also my point of view.

First of all, the core of technology is to make people’s life becomes easier and much more convenient. Thanks to Information Technology in general, due to social media we can communicate with people all around the world costlessly by only a digital devices with internet access. As a result, Communication is thus enhanced, we can keep in touch with friends far away from us or form up new relationship regardless of distance., and companies can negotiate more easily with foreign countries without taking a long-haul flights. Moreover, Modern technology saves us lots of time, whether it’s our cars to transport more fastly, washing-machines to do our laundry, or automated banking to allow us to pay by credit card, use internet banking, or get cash out from the ATM. . At the medical level, technology can help treat more diseases and consequently save many lives and combat extremely harmful viruses and bacteria. Technology has also increased the productivity of almost every industry in the world such as agricultural, economy and industrial works which lessen hard and dangerous works for human. In addition, in education, Virtual communications mean that education can now be delivered remotely to people in far off places. Technology improves access for disabled people. Lessons can be delivered through a wide range of media, including video, audio, text, or images. There is an abundance of material available, including free online help. Students can also submit essays and take online tests which lessen the burden for both teachers and schoolchildren.

On the other hand, technology also has a range of drawbacks. Firstly, as most technological discoveries aim to reduce human effort, it would imply that more work is done by machines. This equates to less work for people. Secondly, social media makes variety problems such as Lack of Emotional Connection, Decreases Communication Skills and increase more mental and physical illnesses. Technology also makes people become lazier .

Personally, I strongly oppose to the idea that technology makes human life’s worse. Besides several critical reasons mentioned as benefits, I would also qualify some drawbacks to be more rational. I think it’s unreasonable to believe our life is becoming worse because of technology. It's never about the tech. Tech is another word for tool. It's all about the user. Tools are all used for good or bad due to the ways user using them. Tools become dangerous when used for purposes not designed or overusing. Our lives only become worse when we fail to control ourselves. Let’s imagine tomorrow when we wake up and technology disappeared, what would happen?

In conclusion, our life is not worse as a result of technology but because of the way we use tech. There will have no dependence on technology if we don’t overusing it. Social media also has no harm when we use it on good purpose and control our time using it in order not to be addicted. People also need to learn to make use of technology reasonably to have a better life quality.

 

 

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Bài này của bạn nêu khá nhiều ý về benefits và drawbacks của technology nhưng organization của bài chưa hợp lý.

1. Mở bài & Kết bài: Chỉ nên ngắn gọn paraphrase lại vấn đề đề cập trong topic, không nên dẫn quá dài, sẽ mất nhiều thời gian không cần thiết. Cần nêu lên quan điểm của bạn: Agree hay disagree với câu hỏi đặt ra, và khẳng định position của mình ngay trong phần mở bài. Kết bài cũng cần ngắn gọn, cũng chỉ nên nhắc lại vấn đề và khẳng định position của mình lần nữa, không nên viết quá dài và đề cập các vấn đề xa với chủ đề đang bàn luận. Đặc biệt, trong văn Academic Writing, không nên dùng câu hỏi.

2. Thân bài: Đưa ra khá nhiều benefits và drawbacks. Nhưng sẽ tốt hơn nếu bạn tóm gọn các ý nhỏ vào những ý lớn hơn thay vì rất nhiều ý nhỏ mà thiếu các examples hay details để chứng minh.Ví dụ, tòm lược trong các lĩnh vực Education, Business & Industry chẳng hạn. 2 đoạn thân khá thiếu cân bằng. Đoạn về Drawbacks cần có organization các ý tốt hơn. Thà ít ý nhưng chất lượng còn hơn là nhiều ý mà nhỏ lẻ quá.

3. Từ vựng: Dùng được khá nhiều collocation và từ vựng phong phú, cần đặc biệt chú ý cách dùng một số collocation. Ví dụ như lessen hard and dangerous works chưa hợp lý. Có thể thay bằng reduce hoặc minimize.

4. Ngữ pháp: tránh lỗi câu run-on, tức là không có từ nối giữa các clauses: Communication is thus enhanced, we can keep in touch with friends far away from us or form up new relationship regardless of distance., and companies can negotiate more easily with foreign countries without taking a long-haul flights.

5. Bài quá dài, hơn 500 từ, rất khó viết trong 40 phút với bố cục tốt. Cần làm outline cẩn thận rồi bắt đầu viết.

Band điểm dự đoán: 5.0-5.5

 

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