Although there has been a large increase in the number of women who go out to work,women continue to do a disproportionate amount of household and childcare.Whatcan be done to promote greater equality between men and women within the home?(please corect this essay for me :)
edited by
4,033 views
0 votes
0 votes
Thanks to cultural movement,such as second-wave feminism ,Conventional role devision has been gradually less stringently defined .As a matter of fact,women have been allowed to enter the workplace and even assume powerful positions which are traditionally dominated by men.Despite their ascension,it is a manifest truth that the female are still tasked with excessive domestic commitment within home.My essay will hightlight some potential sollutions to promote an equal segregation of household tasks for both genders.
On the one hand,i believe that the society has a pivotal role to play in the adjustment of domestic role separatation.Firstly,within schools,sex education that emphasizes the need of equal household sharings for both genders should be reinforced among students.Only when students are well aware of their indespensible parts in home-making later then on,can they potentially turn into responsible parents who are willing to share household tasks with their parnter.The government,in the meanwhile,can join help by launching large-scale campaigns that hopefully remould entrenched perceptions towards the absolute role of the female within the house.It is doubtless that Through such campaigns,Men will be presumably made more conscious of their  responsibility to reduce gender  gaps ,meaning that they might find it worthwhile to shoulder more of domestic burden .Thirdly,i also believe that the state should pave the way for more and more women to step into the laborsource,resulting in a decline in female engagement in home care-taking.If mean still persist on  solely undertaking the role of breadwinners,coupled with women’s less caring for domestic tasks,some serious repercussions like child neglect are likely to arise.To guarantee that offsprings could receive sufficient care from their parents,the male might hence consider sacrifing more time to household affairs

On the other hand,women and men themselves can do a number of things to help redress the imbalance of domestic devision.As for men,one principal réason for their underrepresentation in housework activities may stem from their lack of basic home-making techniques.Therefore, participation in intensive courses that teach domestic skills might be a worthwhile undertaking for the male.As for women,they should spend time conversing with husbands about the matter of household sharings.By anlyzing some obvious benefits associated with doing the chores like a closer bonding with childs,wives could somewhat convince their husbands to be evenly accountable for domestic commitment.
In conclusion,undue female shouldering of household work and childcare could be addressed through some courses of action.While the society has a significant bearing on promoting equity within home,men and women themselves should make joint efforts to eradicate the issue of disproportionate domestic distribution.

.
edited by
by
0 points

Please log in or register to answer this question.

1 Answer

1 vote
1 vote

Chào bạn Nhoccon1988,

Toi tên là Nguyen Tinh xin được góp ý bài của bạn như sau:

- Về bài của bạn viết khá dài khoảng 400 từ, điều này thì bạn sẽ bị không trừ điểm viết thiều từ mà có thể bạn viết không kịp thời gian, vì task 2 chúng ta chỉ có 40 phút, chưa kể khi viết dài mình khả năng bị mắc lỗi ngữ pháp, spelling sẽ cao hơn.

- Body  thứ nhất bạn viết khá nhiều, bạn nên chia nó ra thành 2 đoạn thì sẽ tốt hơn, và làm bài viết của bạn sẽ cân đối hơn.

- Ngoài ra bạn còn mắc lỗi viết hoa không đúng chổ, đôi khi những từ cần viết hoa thì bạn lại không viết.

Tôi sẽ góp ý về những vấn đề còn lại sau.

Chúc bạn thành công!

Nguyen Tính

 

 

Thanks to cultural movement,such as second-wave feminism ,Conventional role devision has been gradually less stringently defined .As a matter of fact,women have been allowed to enter the workplace and even assume powerful positions which are traditionally dominated by men.Despite their ascension,it is a manifest truth that the female are still tasked with excessive domestic commitment within home.My essay will hightlight some potential sollutions to promote an equal segregation of household tasks for both genders.
On the one hand,i believe that the society has a pivotal role to play in the adjustment of domestic role separatation.Firstly,within schools,sex education that emphasizes the need of equal household sharings for both genders should be reinforced among students.Only when students are well aware of their indespensible parts in home-making later then on,can they potentially turn into responsible parents who are willing to share household tasks with their parnter.The government,in the meanwhile,can join help by launching large-scale campaigns that hopefully remould entrenched perceptions towards the absolute role of the female within the house.It is doubtless that Through such campaigns,Men will be presumably made more conscious of their  responsibility to reduce gender  gaps ,meaning that they might find it worthwhile to shoulder more of domestic burden .Thirdly,i also believe that the state should pave the way for more and more women to step into the laborsource,resulting in a decline in female engagement in home care-taking.If mean still persist on  solely undertaking the role of breadwinners,coupled with women’s less caring for domestic tasks,some serious repercussions like child neglect are likely to arise.To guarantee that offsprings could receive sufficient care from their parents,the male might hence consider sacrifing more time to household affairs

On the other hand,women and men themselves can do a number of things to help redress the imbalance of domestic devision.As for men,one principal réason for their underrepresentation in housework activities may stem from their lack of basic home-making techniques.Therefore, participation in intensive courses that teach domestic skills might be a worthwhile undertaking for the male.As for women,they should spend time conversing with husbands about the matter of household sharings.By anlyzing some obvious benefits associated with doing the chores like a closer bonding with childs,wives could somewhat convince their husbands to be evenly accountable for domestic commitment.
In conclusion,undue female shouldering of household work and childcare could be addressed through some courses of action.While the society has a significant bearing on promoting equity within home,men and women themselves should make joint efforts to eradicate the issue of disproportionate domestic distribution.

by
93 points

Related questions