TASK 1 in cambridge 5 test 1 , nhờ mọi người kiểm tra lỗi giúp mình

Question

         

 

The line graph give information about the proportion of people 65 years and over from 1940 to 2040 in three countries Japan, Sweden and Usa.

          According to the line graph , there was a significant decrease from 5% to 4 % in proportion of people Japan between 1940 and 1980 , the proportion of prople Japan increased dramatically from 4% to 8% between 1980 and 2020 , from 2020 to 2040 the proportion of people Japan fluctuated dramatically from 8% to 27 % , While , the proportion of people Sweden grew sharply from 7% to 14% between 1940 and 1980,there was a sharp fluctuation in proportion of people Sweden from14% to 19% from 1980 to 2020 and from 2020 to 2040 the proportion of people Sweden rose steeply from 19% to 26 % , In contact , the proportion of people Usa from 1940 to 1980 went up dramatically from 9% to 14% but from 1980 to 2020 no change by 14 % , from 2020 to 2040 the proportion of people USA climbed steeply from 14% to 23%.

       In conclusion the proportion of people aged 65 and over in three countries increased sharply from 1940 to 2040.

 

Answer 1

Dau tien la theo minh ngay cau dau tien phai la '' ... people at the age of 65 and over..." , USA  phai viet in hoa het.

Theo sach day task 1 minh doc va da kiem chung, " according to" nen tranh dung vi khi dung cum tu nay phai ban can phai dan ra nguon thong tin ( thuong la dung trong survey, research..), thay vao do la " Overall "

"Proportion'' nen da dang hoa. Co nhieu tu dong nghia nhu " percentage" , "amount"  " number" .

Ve cum tu dien ta nam thi co the dung them " during the period of " , " in the first/ next 2/3 years " , " in the next 2/3 years " vi minh thay ban lap lai cau truc " between..from'' , '' from..to" qua nhieu.

Answer 2

           The line graph gives information about the proportion of people 65 years old and over from 1940 to 2040 in three countries : Japan, Sweden and Usa.

          According to the line graph , there was a slight (significant means sharp/big) decrease from 5% to 4 % in the proportion of Japanese elders between 1940 and 1980 but was subsequently followed by a notable rise from 4% to 8% between 1980 and 2020. From 2020 to 2040 the line sharply escalated to 27 %.

           While the percentage of the old in Sweden grew sharply from 7% to 14% between 1940 and 1980, there was a sharp fluctuation in proportion of people Sweden from14% to 19% from 1980 to 2040. In the last year of the period, the proportion will probably reach the zenith of nearly 27%.

           In contrast , although the rate of people aged 65 and over in the U.S from 1940 to 1980 went up dramatically from 9% to 14%, in the next twenty years the line reached a plateau. During the last period, the proportion is likely to surge to 23%, making it the highest percentage it ever reached.

       In conclusion. the proportion of people aged 65 and over in three countries increased sharply from 1940 to 2040.

Overall

Not very impressive. Be careful with punctuation, grammar and vocabulary. Need far more practice!!