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Traffic problem has become more and more serious nowadays, especially in the large cities. One of the solutions to this case is application of public transports. However, this has its pros and cons. In my opinion, the greatest advantage of public transports is its contribution to preserve the environment. Using this means could reduce pollution because there would be fewer cars driving on the roads.It means there would be fewer fumes and could avoid traffic jams also. Furthermore, public transport is more economical for many people such as students and the low-paid workers. In the other side, using public vehicles can be also disadvantageous because they are not available at any time. So we could spend even some hours waiting. Moreover, buses are usually so crowded that it would be difficult for us to control our belongs. It would give chance for criminal to act, especially in the rush hours. In conclusion, public transport has not only advantages but also disadvantages. Personally, I support using public transport because it is environmentally friendly.

 
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Mình nghĩ một bài luận TOEFL cần phải có Introduction-2 hoặc 3 Body Para- Conclusion, mấy cái đó mỗi cái là một đoạn nên bạn không nên viết gộp chung như vậy.

Cái nữa là, bạn nên xem lại một số outline và hướng dẫn của thầy cô về writig. Mình thấy bài viết còn khá sơ sài, structure chưa đúng. Thiếu supporting detais khá nhiều
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Traffic problem has become more and more serious nowadays, especially in the large cities. One of the solutions to this case is application of public transports. However, this has its pros and cons. In my opinion, the greatest advantage of public transports is its contribution to preserve the environment. Using this means could reduce pollution because there would be fewer cars driving on the roads.It means there would be fewer fumes and could avoid traffic jams also. Furthermore, public transport is more economical for many people such as students and the low-paid workers. In the other side, using public vehicles can be also disadvantageous because they are not available at any time. So we could spend even some hours for waiting. Moreover, buses are usually so crowded that it would be difficult for us to control our belongs. It would give chance for criminal to act, especially in the rush hours. In conclusion, public transport has not only advantages but also disadvantages. Personally, I support using public transport because it is environmentally friendly.

Mình thấy bài viết của bạn ngắn quá!

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