Video games- Do the advantages outweigh the drawbacks ?

Question

It is an irrefutable fact that video games play an indispensable role in entertaining and educating people. While some supporters of this technology believe that it is great means of entertainment, others hold a contrasting view towards it. From my perspective, I believe that they are more likely to have a harmful impact.

            On the one hand, the benefit of video games is not only entertaining but also providing more opportunities to acquire knowledge and develop some significant skills to face the real world challenges. For instance, while playing strategy games, it encourages gamers creativity, imagination as well as concentration, logical thinking and problem solving or even leadership and predictability. Thus, it is clear that, this gaming technology can be both entertaining and educating.

However, I believe that the about analysis just covers a few effect of playing video games. In fact, there is abundant negativeness involved in this tempting hobby. Firstly, video games can lead to misleading flow of thoughts, following by behavioral deterioration such as violence, alcoholism or even crime. This is clearly shown through the ever-increasing rate of crime in adolescent age in recent years. Furthermore, sitting in front of screen for hours daily may encounter children with variety of health issues including the diseases of eyes, back-bone and the body weight. Needless to say, it is understandable that the use of video games in one way or another can have a far-reaching effect children’s physical and mental development.

In conclusion, I restate that videos games have more harmful effects than positive sides. It is recommended that there should be a balance in playing video games to make a full use of it.

276 words

Answer 1

It is an irrefutable (sweeping, cần giảm nhẹ) fact that video games play an indispensable (sweeping) role in entertaining and educating people. While some supporters of this technology believe that it is great means of entertainment, others hold a contrasting view towards it. From my perspective (Mình nghĩ bạn dùng sai từ), I believe that they are more likely to have a harmful impact.

            On the one hand, the benefit (benefits) of video games is not only entertaining but also providing more opportunities to acquire knowledge and develop some significant skills to face the real world challenges. For instance, while playing strategy games, it encourages gamers creativity, imagination as well as concentration, logical thinking and problem solving or even leadership and predictability. Thus, it is  clear (clearly) that, this gaming technology can be both entertaining and educating.

However, I believe that the about analysis just covers a few effect of playing video games. In fact, there is abundant negativeness involved in this tempting hobby. Firstly, video games can lead to misleading flow of thoughts, following by behavioral deterioration such as violence, alcoholism or even crime. This is clearly shown through the ever-increasing rate of crime in adolescent age in recent years. Furthermore, sitting in front of screen for hours daily may encounter children with variety of health issues including the diseases of eyes, back-bone and the body weight. Needless to say, it is understandable that the use of video games in one way or another can have a far-reaching effect children’s physical and mental development.

In conclusion, I restate that videos games have more harmful effects than positive sides. It is recommended that there should be a balance in playing video games to make a full use of it.

Answer 2

Đây là góp ý của mình :D

the benefit of video games is not only entertaining => the benefits of video games are not only the entertainment

encourages gamers creativity , imagination as well as concentration, logical thinking and problem solving or even leadership and predictability=> encourages players in creativity, imagination, concentration, logical thinking, problem-solving, leadership or even predictability.

about => above

effect => effects

 there is abundant negativeness => there are a variety of drawbacks

 may encounter children with  variety of health issues => may make children suffer from various health issues