Bạn cần phải cóp đề vào bài của bạn chứ ghi chung chung thế sao biết mà nhận xét bài bạn?
Along with the explosive growth of the economy, urbanization and modernization has come up as inevitable things. Whereas some people are in favor of the notion that a horizontal city with a few skyscrapers is an ideal living place, others maintain the view of the vertical city with lots of tall buildings. From my perspective, the former view option carries more weight.
hise-rise
First and foremost, it is undeniable that a vertical city brings about more convenience owning to its small size. The citizens are able to save time and money thanks to the low travelling cost and short distance. Another positive impact is that there is more land and space for community constructions such as parks, schools, airports and so forth. Last but not least, tall structures could serve many functions simultaneously. For example, instead of only being used as an apartment, a building could function as a mixed combination of accommodations, workplaces and entertainment sites. Nevertheless, people in a vertical city could possibly face the problem of high population density and privacy loss.
thanks to và owning to gần nhau.
Có thể nói costs of living/ travelling and travel time have been reduced...
Các gạch đều là thừa hoặc nên thay bằng từ khác academic hơn (gõ vào Word rồi tìm synonym).
Riêng gạch cuối bỏ đi, bài đã dài còn thêm ý này đi ngược lại nữa.
In spite of the benefits that city with many high-rise buildings brings, I do believe that living in a horizontal city, where few skyscrapers are found is a better option. Firstly, people do not waste money for the expenses to run a multi–storey buildings, including elevators, water and power supply and security. Secondly, there would be more fresh air and natural space which make people closer to the nature and therefore, the average longevity and their awareness of environmental protection are raised. However, this type of living is not popular because not many people could afford to have their own houses.
Viết ngắn gọn hơn.
Ý đầu tiên viết ngắn quá thành khó hiểu. There should be wasteful financial bugets spent on similar necesary facilitate.
Ý hai chưa nói rõ thì phải, mình đọc nhưng không hiểu lắm! There would be tức là bạn đề xuất à? Thế còn bây giờ?
In conclusion, both vertical and horizontal cities have their own pros and cons, the decision of living places is dependent on personal preference and financial ability. To me, life in a horizontal city is more appealing.
Câu đầu ổn.
Câu sau (tách ra) cần thêm một số ý.
Tham khảo:
From low crime rates to a great education system, there are many variables to consider when choosing that perfect place that you and your family can call home.
Bạn có thể đề cập cả 2 dạng, nhưng vì bạn chọn A nên bạn phải nói A + còn B - chứ không phải liệt kê cả 2. Còn nếu là dạng Discuss both views, bạn phải nói ngang bằng các ý + và - cho cả 2 dạng.