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Some people believe that people who read books can develop more imagination and language skills than those who prefer to watch TV. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent decades, TV shows have been receiving a great deal of attention from either government or media companies thanks to their rising viewers. While it is undeniable that TV programs have played an important role in conveying information, reading books has been considered an unchangeable source to boost own brain, especially in terms of imagination and language.

There are a number of reasons why reading books are conducive to our capability to the imagination. First, since most categories of books do not have any illustrations, such as images and sounds, it requires readers to thoroughly focus on linking their knowledge with the insight information. This means that they are required to portray the picture of the book in their own way, which not only strengthens their ability to think creatively but also helps them to remember better. Second, a myriad of new-generation books has contained uncommon ideas about mystery topics, such as the universe, giving us a chance to dive into our space of imagination. For example, by writing about the war between gods, fiction books have attracted the majority of kids and bring them to unlimited thinking even if it is sometimes unreality

In addition, grasp knowledge by reading books is more likely to enhance our learning skills, especially in language. Since a majority of books have written with formal words, readers not only could improve their reading skills but also could widen their lexical resources. In fact, a student would have a higher performance in literacy if they read academic books frequently thanks to their rich in vocabulary. Furthermore, by getting exposed to formal writing, readers could learn how to write an essay with a clear structure with a high level of coherence. This acts as an incentive for students to get excited about literacy, which contributes to their probability of success in the future.

In conclusion, reading books should be gotten more attention from either students or employees in order to develop the imagination and language skills

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2 Answers

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good essay
i think you can be 7.5-8
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bạn ơi bài này viết khá tốt, theo mình thì sẽ ở band 7.5. Tuy nhiên mình thấy bạn có sử dụng cấu trúc "either...or" trong 2 câu. Chắc bạn cũng biết cấu trúc này mang nghĩa là "hoặc...hoặc...", dùng để khẳng định khả năng có thể xảy ra đối với một trong số hai đối tượng được nói tới (hoặc là xảy ra với đối tượng thứ nhất hoặc là xảy ra với đối tượng thứ hai). Ví dụ như ở câu kết luận: "reading books should be gotten more attention from either students or employees in order to develop the imagination and language skills" mình nghĩ bạn nên thay bằng cấu trúc "both...and" thì sẽ hợp lý hơn. Nghĩa là đọc sách nên được ưa chuộng bởi cả học sinh và người đi làm chứ không phải hoặc là học sinh hoặc là người đi làm. 

Ngoài ra thì còn một vài lỗi nhỏ nữa, ví dụ như trong câu "fiction books have attracted the majority of kids and bring them to unlimited thinking even if it is sometimes unreality" nên sửa "bring" thành "brought".

Có một chỗ bạn dùng "their rich" chắc nên sửa thành "their richness"

Nếu không sai những lỗi thế này thì có lẽ bạn sẽ lên được ban 8.0-8.5

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