IELTS task 1 , Could you give me the band score of my essay ?

Question

The table illustrates the proportion of people using mobile phone for many different purposes in the years 2006, 2008 and 2010.

It is clear that the percentage of using cell phone for making calls was the highest during three years. However, there was noticeable increase in the popularity of six remaining features.

In 2006, The feature accounting for the highest proportion was making calls, at 100%. While the figures for taking photo and using text messages were slightly lower,  nearly 66% and 73% respectively. The percentages of playing games and music were less than 20% and there were no figures for people using Internet search or recording video.

Over the following four years, there were relatively changes in the figures for making calls, taking photos and text messages. However, four remaining features saw a significant increase in the proportions of them. The percentage of people using their phones to search the internet climbed to 41% in 2008 and 73% in 2010. There was a considerable increase in the uses of  playing games and music, reaching at 41% and 26% respectively in 2010.

Answer 1

The table illustrates the proportion of people using a mobile phone for many different purposes in the years 2006, 2008, and 2010.

It is clear that the percentage of using a cell phone for making calls was the highest for three years. However, there was a noticeable increase in the popularity of the six remaining features.

In 2006, The feature accounting for the highest proportion was making calls, at 100%. While the figures for taking photos and using text messages were slightly lower, nearly 66% and 73% respectively. The percentages of playing games and music were less than 20% and there were no figures for people using Internet search or recording video.

Over the following four years, there were relative changes in the figures for making calls, taking photos, and text messages. However, four remaining features saw a significant increase in the proportions of them. The percentage of people using their phones to search the internet climbed to 41% in 2008 and 73% in 2010. There was a considerable increase in the uses of playing games and music, reaching 41% and 26% respectively in 2010.

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