some people believe that nowadays we have many too choices.. What extent do you agree or disagree this statement?

Question

Nowadays, when society develops day by day, specifically modern technology, the people have many choices of everything in the best way. However, a section of society can not choose even basic things. Therefore, I partly agree this opinion. On the one hand, society is increasingly growing, so, of course, we can choose lots of things in any ways.This view is possible seen in the daily life. Everyday, people can afford necessities. When we go to supermarket, we can buy food, drink, choose different courses of products according to the hobby, nutrients. If people need buy electronic devices such as TV, smartphone, laptop,.., people have many selections with their income in different manufacturers. In addition, people easily move somewhere by modern transportation such as bus, car, bike,..Moreover, the students can study their favorite subjects and dream of something, are wanted to reach. The students have good education and they are taken care of carefully. What a great life! On the other hand, nowadays, a part of community, specifically undeveloped countries, can not choose even necessities daily. They have lots of hard problems in their lives. In African country, the people do not have clean water recourse to drink, not have lots of food to eat, so that causes of many diseases and malnutrition. They have problems of healthy. People do not have electronic devices to use and transportation to move. Especially, the children is not concerned carefully and not treated equally. The number of students must not not go to school to study. Somebody must work although they are under 18. In conclusion, in the modern life, many people can choose everything according to their hobby, finances. But, besides, other people do not have even basic conditions. So the comfortable life is very far from them.

Answer 1

the essay should be divided into 3: the intro, body and conclusion

in academic essay you should not use exclamation sentence and

                               you should use people, they instead of we

use more academic words

there are synonyms of lots of, many: a wide range of, an abundance of, ....