Question

Topic:  Successful  sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

 

  It’s true  that  nowadays sports stars can earn incredibly high salaries . Although , there are some reasons can justify it, I personally believe that sports professionals should be paid much less.

  There are several reasons why people support much incomes for sports. Firstly, people who reach the highest levels in any sports must be uniquely talented. For example, it is rare to find someone with the football skills of Messi or Rolnado. Hence, it is argue to pay them lots of money because of their talent.  Secondly, even the most talented sports must undergo many years of intensively training to develop their skills  and this takes great passion and effort. Finally, sports stars’s incomes are high because their spectaculars and fans are willing to pay to watch their favorite sports stars.

  However, I agree with those who believe we should support more the dedication of other important professionals.The main reason for this argument is that I believe other fields such as education, healthcare or economy... are vital for human beings. All people need doctors to take care of them as well as engineers to invent new machines to make our life better and better. I other words, we can live without sports stars but can’s live without doctors and engineers. Another argument is that everybody should be given salaries that reflect the amount of work they do. However, the great disparity in incomes of them is unjust that while a doctor being work fine to nine, five days a week earns significant less than a football player who only plays  a game for a couple of hours a week.

  In conclusion, the contribution of not only sports stars but also  other crucial professionals should be given recognition and we should support more to other vital fields rather then support for sports.

Answer 1

Nhìn chung nội dung bài của bạn khá tốt, đầy đủ. Có các lỗi sau cần chú ý:

1. Introduction:

    can earn=> can be got ( không nên lặp lại từ ở đề bài)

2. Body:

PARA 1:
    For sports= sports stars

    Rolnado=> Ronaldo( cái này tên người không quan trọng lắm nhưng nên viết chuẩn)

    ở câu: Secondly, even the most talented sports=> phải là ....sports stars

    Finally, sports stars;s incomes=> the income of sports stars

    spectaculars( từ này là tính từ)=> spectators( mình nghĩ đây là từ bạn muốn dùng)

PARA 2:

    chỗ healthcare or economy.... không được dùng dấu "..."

     I other words=> In other words

     câu cuối mình k hiểu lắm: " while a doctor being work fine to nine" nghĩa là sao?

3. Conclusion: rather then=> rather than

                           từ cuối cùng sports=> vì đang nói về thể thao nói chung chứ k phải môn thể thao