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Nowadays more and more young people hold the important positions in the government. Some people think that is a good thing while others argue that it is not suitable. Discuss both view and give your opinion

 

ANSWER

It’s true that in recent years, there are a noticeable number of young people who play important roles in the government. While I accept that there are both benefits and drawbacks of this issue, I would argue that it brings more advantages.

On the one hand, working in political field is sometimes difficult for young officers. Firstly, political jobs always require experience which young people often lack in their earlier years of working. For instance, it’s very difficult for a young person to deal with too many different kinds of people that he have to face in a public office. Secondly, there is a burden of pressure in politics where any wrong-making decision would make negative impacts on a large number of people. This kind of jobs often need a mature head rather than a young heart.

On the other hand, I do believe that many young-aged people are well able to work in different positions in the government. One reason is that, nowadays, most of young officers are well-educated and familiar with high technology which allows them to work more efficiently than their old colleagues. For example, they can easily use smart devices to check emails, arrange meetings or make working schedule anytime and anywhere while old officers often need assistants for the jobs. Furthermore, young people tend to be liberal and innovative than the elders. These virtues can help them to make reckless thoughts which sometimes create great revolutions.

In conclusion, there are convincing arguments both for and against young people taking important positions in the government, but it seems to me that this would bring more benefits.

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HI :)) i must say that ur essay is really good and interesting too. u have ideals clearly stated, strong argument and academic words. love that :)

Yet, there's only one thing i'd like to change : u use too much 'young". u can change like callow worker, employees at a tender age instead

But on the whole, ur essay is excellent

P/S : If u have time, can u please check mine. Here's the link

http://scholarshipplanet.info/check/2119/bai-ielts-task-2-ngay-10-01

Btw, if possible, do u wanna befriend me. we can do some practice together
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54 points

2 Comments

Thanks hangvu for your encouraging comment.
My essay is score 5.5 only according to my teacher's assessment :)
Of course, I'd love to make friend and practice English with you. Pls contact me at [email protected].
I'm rather busy these days but I'll try to comment on yours writing when I have free time.
5.5 only :3 i don't think it's that low. maybe u can try more structure to make it more academic. yet i still prefer this simple writing style

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