Do you agree or disagree ??

Question

People tend to work longer hours nowadays. Working long hours has a negative effect on themselves, their families, and society. So working hours should be restricted. Do you agree or disagree?

My writing :
Working longer hours getting more common in today's society. I believe that that this is not only having a severe impact on the health of the worker's employees but also on their families and society. In other words, I agree with the idea of limiting working hours

A few decades ago, a person normally worked an average of eight hours per day, average daily hours in recent years. However, everyone regularly works until the eleventh or even twelfth hours per day. This, in my opinion, is the effect on health and productivity. When they come back home, they feel very tired ( ...)
, they don't have time to play with their children
. Even if they become irritable, vexed.

I also think that extended hours of work have serious consequences for families and communities. At the family level, overworking prevent those from taking family trips and talking about their life story. For instance, my sister is always working until the evening but gets up early to go to work. After a working hard day, she does not devote time to a voluntary activity that brings benefits for their society. It takes a long time for us to outdoor and drinks together milk tea.

In summary, busy working should be reduced hours to work. It helps extent an adverse effect on employees, the family bonds, and their communities.

( I would like to see your feedback )

Answer 1

Working longer hours is getting (more)->more and more common in today's society. I believe that (this is not only having a severe impact on the health of the worker's employees but also on their families and society)->this phenomenon could impact severely not only on workers’ health but also on their families and societies. In other words, I agree with the idea of limiting working hours

A few decades ago, a person normally worked (an average of eight hours per day) ->eight hours a day in average, average daily hours in recent years. However, everyone (regularly)->recently/these days works until the (eleventh or even twelfth)->eleven or even twelve hours per day. This, in my opinion, is the effect on health and productivity. When they come back home, they feel very tired and they don't have time to play with their children. Even if they become irritable, vexed.

I also think that extended hours of work have serious consequences for families and communities. (At the family level)->For families, overworking prevents those from taking family trips and talking about their life story. For instance, my sister (is always working)-> always works until the evening but gets up early to go to work. After a (working hard)->hard-working day, she does not devote time to a voluntary activity that brings benefits for their-> her society. It takes a long time for us to go outdoor and (drinks together milk tea)-> drink milk tea together.

In summary, busy working should be reduced hours to work. It helps extent an adverse effect on employees, the family bonds, and their communities.

 

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