Bài này mình viết về advantages of the internet. Mình mới học tới background hôi nên hơi nhiều lỗi, mong mng thông cảm

Question

The internet is gradually becoming more important in human life, and as you know, the internet provides many benefits by some reasons. To begin with, it is a large collection of information that can help people in finding what they are looking for, such as a suitable job or a well-known dish. However, some people should be aware that the internet is not a place you can completely trust because wrong information can sometimes appear on the internet. Secondly, the internet is a fantastic source of entertainment and news. For example, you can listen to popular music or view some movies have interesting elements. Maybe it helped us a lot to brighten up our mood after a long day at school or at work. Lastly, the internet takes an important position in communication. If in the past, people had to use letter to write the words they wanted to say and took a long time to send to the recipient, today we just need to pick up our smartphones, connect to the internet and then we can send any message to your recipient. To conclude, the internet is one of the greatest human inventions, and given the benefits that it provides, I hope that every part of the globe will have access to it like North Korea, Chad and other countries.

Answer 1

The internet is gradually becoming more important in human life, and as you know, -->  câu này ko nên dùng trong văn viết, the internet provides many benefits by some reasons. -->  Câu này có thể viết lại thành The internets is gradually becoming more important in human life due to a lot of benefits it have brought. To begin with, -->  Firstly, it is a large collection of information that can help people in finding -->  dùng cầu trúc help sb to do sth --> help people to find out what they are looking for -->  want to look for, such as a suitable job or a well-known dish. However, some people should be aware that the internet is not a place you can completely trust because wrong information can sometimes appear on the internet. Secondly, the internet is a fantastic source of entertainment and news. For example, you can listen to popular music or view some movies have interesting elements -->  watch interesting movies (phải đảm bảo cấu trúc song song khi dùng and hoặc or). Maybe it helped us a lot to brighten up -->  to broaden our mood after a long day at school or at work. Lastly,-->  Finally, the internet takes an important position -->  role in communication. If in the past, people had to use letter to write the words -->  letters they wanted to say and took a long time to send to the recipient, today we just need to pick up our smartphones, connect to the internet and then we can send any message to your recipient. -->  Câu này có thể diễn đạt lại thành Nowdays, with only a click, people can send long emails to recipients. To conclude, -->  trong văn viết nên dùng In conclusion, the internet is one of the greatest human inventions, and given the benefits that it provides, I hope that every part of the globe will have access to it like North Korea, Chad and other countries.