Sample IELTS Task 2 - separate schools or mixed schools

Question

There is a school of thought believes that Schools should be classified by gender. While reasons can be given to justify this, I would agree that students would gain  more advantages when studying in mixed schools.

 

On the one hand, there are those who assert that it is more effective to educate boys and girls in single - sex schools. Firstly, this environment may allow their parents be safe in the knowledge that their children will focus on studying at school and not be distracted by falling in love with an opposite gender or have a crush on somebody. Secondly, education program is designed to include  subjects in order to be suitable for each gender in school. For example, girls are not as strong as boys but they still have to study physical’ subjects at same level in mixed school. Therefore, separate schools will solve this problem effectively.

 

On the other hand, I side with those who contend that mixed schools bring many advantages to both gender. One justification is that studying in mixed school is the best of both worlds because students will embrace knowledge about both academic and society. This kind of schools provide  opportunities for girls and boys to understand about each other’ difficulties and characteristics. As a result, it is easier for them to blend in society in their future working life and have experience to communicate with the opposite gender. 

 

In conclusion, although it is true that single - sex schools is beneficial to each gender, I firmly believe that mixed schools is a better choice for girls and boys to study and have comprehensive development.

 

Answer 1

1. You wrote: ...es that Schools should be classified by gender. While reasons can be given to justify ...

Suggestion: a gender, the gender

2. You wrote: ...se who assert that it is more effective to educate boys and girls in single - sex schools....Error type: Gerund error

Suggestion: effective at educating, effective in educating

 

4. You wrote: ...For example, girls are not as strong as boys but they still have to study physical’ subj...

Error type: Punctuation error

Suggestion: boys, but

 

5. You wrote: ...ely. On the other hand, I side with those who contend that mixed schools bring ma...

Error type: Number agreement error

Suggestion: this who,

6. You wrote: ...her hand, I side with those who contend that mixed schools bring many advantages to both gender. O...Suggestion: , those mixed schools

7. You wrote: ...d schools bring many advantages to both gender. One justification is that studying in ...Suggestion: both genders

8. You wrote: ...both academic and society. This kind of schools provide opportunities for girls and bo...Suggestion: , these kinds of schools

9. You wrote: ...ficial to each gender, I firmly believe that mixed schools is a better choice for girls and boys t...