Pressure on the school and university student is increasing and students are put to work hard when then are young. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Question

Nowadays, students are dealing with high pressure about a large amount of knowledge at university. While there are some negatives to some impacts on them, I would argue that working hard at university is more beneficial development.

On the one hand, there are a number of major negatives. Firstly, pressure on the school and university students from working hard is the cause of inefficient learning. With a great amount of knowledge acquired on the regular basic, students are more likely to be tired and bored. In addition, they have no time to reflect about everything that they had studied at school. Secondly, university students are easily stressed if they cannot strike a balance between work and leisure. Therefore, their enthusiasm for learning will be reduced, resulting in the poor academic performance.  In the worse cases, they can stop the academic path if they are under a great amount of pressure.

On the other hand, I would argue that this tendency brings a wide range of benefits. First of all, students might study a variety of knowledge with all fields in their life. As a result, they might have experiences and opportunities to seek for a well-paid job with the ideal foundation that they had studied at university. Furthermore, when they work hard in early years, they can directly address problems arising in real life and might learn how to control themselves such as time management, financial management, etc. This helps them become more mature and confident when they graduate.

In conclusion, I believe that being pushed into working hard brings more positive developments than the disadvantages.

Answer 1

Source: https://s3-ap-southeast-1.amazonaws.com/ielts.forums/Writing-Task-1_-Pressure-on-students-2.docx

CRITERIA	GRADE	COMMENT
Task Response	6	• addresses the requirements of the task • (A) presents an overview with information appropriately selected • (GT) presents a purpose that is generally clear; there may be inconsistencies in tone • presents and adequately highlights key features/ bullet points but details may be irrelevant, inappropriate or inaccurate
Coherence and Cohesion	6	• arranges information and ideas coherently and there is a clear overall progression • uses cohesive devices effectively, but cohesion within and/or between sentences may be faulty or mechanical • may not always use referencing clearly or appropriately
Lexical Resource	6	• uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task • attempts to use less common vocabulary but with some inaccuracy • makes some errors in spelling and/or word formation, but they do not impede communication
Grammatical Range and Accuracy	6	• uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms • makes some errors in grammar and punctuation but they rarely reduce communication
Overall	6