PLEASE CORRECT MY WRITING TASK 2. THANKS IN ADVANCE

Question

TOPIC: Some people believe that time spent on television, video and computer games can be beneficial to children. Others believe this has negative effects on a child.

MY ESSAY:

Nowadays, the massive development of the media has made a great contribution to society, which includes education programs for children. However, whether studying on television, video and computer games can bring more benefits than negative effects is a controversial issue. I believe that we should make the most of those materials to support children to study better.

First, it is true that the information resource from the Internet is enormous and in every domain in life. This means that there is no obstacle for pupils to discover the world around and fill up their minds with just a computer or a television. The lessons applied the progressive technology allow students to visualize lively and experience in the most practical ways. For example, with the presence of 3-D technology, parents now are able to bring a Jurassic world with all types of dinosaurs into their child's room. Therefore, the media is an essential tool that plays a critical role in schools.

Those who harbor the view that the Internet, television and computer games negatively affect their children are partly right. These days, many adolescents are addicted to playing online games and gradually drifting away from the society outside. Moreover, the world on the Internet is also very sophisticated that the learners may neglect the study purpose to sink themselves into the virtual experience. This, notwithstanding, can be circumscribed if youngsters are guided to utilize the Internet properly by not only the teachers but their parents. Thus, in spite of the potential risks, the pros still outweigh the cons.

In conclusion, what schools and families should do is to get technology involved in education programs of future generations in the 4.0 era. Simultaneously, it is crucial to supervise the activities of children in order to ensure that they do not misuse the media.
(300 words)

 

Answer 1

Nowadays, the massive development of the media has made a great contribution to society, which includes education programs for children. However, whether studying on television, video and computer games can bring more benefits than negative effects is a controversial issue. I believe that we should make the most of those materials to support children to study better.

First, it is true that the information resource from the Internet is enormous and in every domain in life. This means that there is no obstacle for pupils to discover the world around and fill up their minds with just a computer or a television. The lessons applied the progressive technology allow students to visualize lively and experience in the most practical ways. For example, with the presence of 3-D technology, parents now are able to bring a Jurassic world with all types of dinosaurs into their child's room. Therefore, the media is an essential tool that plays a critical role in schools.

Those who harbor the view that the Internet, television and computer games negatively affect their children are partly right. These days, many adolescents are addicted to playing online games and gradually drifting away from the society outside. Moreover, the world on the Internet is also so sophisticated that the learners may neglect the study purpose to sink themselves into the virtual experience. This, notwithstanding, can be circumscribed if youngsters are guided to utilize the Internet properly by not only the teachers but their parents. Thus, in spite of the potential risks, the pros still outweigh the cons.

In conclusion, what schools and families should do is to get technology involved in education programs of future generations in the 4.0 era. Simultaneously, it is crucial to supervise the activities of children in order to ensure that they do not misuse the media. 

 

Answer 2

Nowadays, the massive development of the media has made a great contribution to society, which includes education programs for children. However, whether studying on television, video and computer games can bring more benefits than negative effects is a controversial issue. I believe that we should make the most of those materials to support children to study better. ( bài này có yêu cầu opinion không ạ)

First, it is true that the information resource from the Internet is enormous and in every domain in life. This means that there is no obstacle for pupils to discover the world around and fill up their minds with just a computer or a television. The lessons applied the progressive technology allow students to visualize lively and experience in the most practical ways. For example, with the presence of 3-D technology, parents now are able to bring a Jurassic world with all types of dinosaurs into their child's room. Therefore, the media is an essential tool that plays a critical role in schools.

Those who harbor the view that the Internet, television and computer games negatively affect their children are partly right. These days, many adolescents are addicted to play online games and gradually drifting away from the society outside. Moreover, the world on the Internet is also very sophisticated that the learners may neglect the study purpose to sink themselves into the virtual experience. This, notwithstanding, can be circumscribed if youngsters are guided to utilize the Internet properly by not only the teachers but (also) their parents. Thus, in spite of the potential risks, the pros still outweigh the cons.

In conclusion, what schools and families should do is to get technology involved in education programs of future generations in the 4.0 era. Simultaneously, it is crucial to supervise the activities of children in order to ensure that they do not misuse the media. 

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