Mình học lớp 10 nên có gì sửa sai, anh chị góp ý nhé:
(AAA): Nhận xét
(Ex: AAA): chữa nguyên câu/chữa nhận xét
AAA: sửa từ
The two pictures illustrate the same island, before and after its development for in term of tourism.
Overall, the second layout of the island has been a popular tourist attraction involves,which is now involving the appearance of many man-made (another word: artificial) constructions especially in the West and the centre without destroying any vegetation. There are no changes to the vegetations. The island has been a site for tourists. (I think you should reduce words in an overall trend as much as possible.However,your idea about the trend should be clear)
From the first map, this is clearly it is clear that/it can be seen that/as is shown seemingly by the graph/the graph indicates,... a vast island with some coconuts coconut trees/coconut palms to the left and the right of the place in (I'm not sure about your preposition.Another idea : of)an island.(Another way to express: From the first map, it is clear that there were some coconut palms which were located/located right in the center and in the West of the island). There is also a small beach in the West. The while the length of the island is about 250 metres.
The most noticeable change from the first picture (I think you should use another word such as: atlas,map,.. in order to enrich your vocabulary) in to ( change from sth to sth ) the second one is that there have been many facilities put up (The word "put up" is less formal than "build" and the word "build" is less formal than "construct". .Another word to express: added,constructed,.)for traveller's care. To be more precise, there are now some houses for accommodation in the middle and in the left handside left-hand side of the island which were connected with others by the footpath leading to the beach where was available for swimming (I think it's quite complicated) (Ex:To be more precise, while there was a beach available for swimming, many houses for accomodation were added in the central and left-hand island which was connected/linked with each others and the west seashore by footpath) . Between them, there is a restaurant and a reception centre with vehicle tracks going down to the pier, which facilitates for the sailboat activities.
Comment and Improvement:Grammar mistakes.I think you should focus on phrasal verbs more.Here is an evidence of "construct,put up and build" 
Good luck.Here is my facebook account whether you'd like to get in touch with me .Account: Do Huan.Avatar: LA city.