Góp ý giúp mình nhé : Should physical education be dropped from school curriculum?

Question

            On average,physical subjects make up 2 lessons per week.This small number however causes a hot debate among people that whether physical education should be eliminated from school curriculum or not.In my opinion,I support studying gymnastics at school for three main reasons.

         First and foremost,students had better be offered a comprehensive education.It is common knowledge that a person is a perfect combination of two factors:psychology and physiology.It means that In addition to mental exercises,students need physical lessons in order to improve their health.In fact,a healthy body enables pupils to concentrate on their lecture much more effectively.

          Another convincing aspect of physical education relates to career opportunity for teachers.According to annual surveys,there are thousands of students graduating from gymnastic field every year.As a result,if physical education does not exist any more,unemployed rate will increase considerably.To make the situation worse,many physical schools will be closed due to the low demand in society.

       Last but not least,gymnastics at high school contributes to find out potential atheletics for a country.Thanks to periodic exams,teachers fully know which level students' sport ability reaches.Afterthat,teachers will build suitable training courses even send pupils to national centers to develop their skills to the maximum.A basket ball player called Kelly Olynyk is an outstanding example.

                  To put it in a nutshell,physical education is considered necessary.Therefore,students should pay more attention to this subject.Besides,schools should change teaching method to inspire their students as well.

Answer 1

Theo mình thì nên viết như thế này (ý kiến riêng thôi nhé :D )

On average,physical subjects make up 2 lessons per week.This small number however causes a hot debate among people that whether physical education should be eliminated from school curriculum or not.In my opinion,I support studying gymnastics at school for three main reasons.( nên nêu 3 lý do đó ra: supporting other academic subjects, career opportunity and finding promising athletes)

         First and foremost,students had better be offered a comprehensive education.It is common knowledge that a person is a perfect combination of two factors:psychology and physiology.It means that In addition to mental exercises,students need physical lessons in order to improve their health.In fact,a healthy body enables pupils to concentrate on their lecture much more effectively. (ý này tốt nè :D )

          Another convincing aspect of physical education relates to career opportunity for teachers.According to annual surveys,there are thousands of students graduating from gymnastic field every year.As a result,if physical education does not exist any more,unemployed rate will increase considerably.To make the situation worse,many physical schools will be closed due to the low demand in society.

       Last but not least,gymnastics at high school contributes to find out potential atheletics (athletes) for a country.Thanks to periodic exams,teachers fully know which level students' sport ability reaches.Afterthat,teachers will build suitable training courses even send pupils to national centers to develop their skills to the maximum.A basket ball player called Kelly Olynyk is an outstanding example.

                  To put it in a nutshell (nên thay bằng "In conclusion",...),physical education is considered necessary.Therefore,students should pay more attention to this subject.Besides,schools should change teaching method to inspire their students as well.