Bài IELTS Task 2 Cam 15

Question

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

    It is widely assumed that in the upcoming years, people might replace printed newspapers or books with online ones since articles or books on the Internet are free. This is a notion with which I completely agree.

    To begin with, printing makes a significant contribution to environmental pollution. Specifically, papers are made of wood, thus if people want to manufacture papers, huge numbers of trees must be cut down. This not only exacerbates deforestation but also erosion soil. Besides, the cost is an essential factor influencing the aforementioned trend. This is reasonable because traditional newspapers have greater reliability when they hire professional journalists to write their articles. These writers have to sell virtual editions at high prices to merit their considerable efforts.

    In addition, without a doubt, accessing information online is a faster and more convenient method. Just with a click, a wide range of alternative kinds of magazines will immediately appear. As a result, people can select appropriate topics that suit themselves with the latest news of those topics. For busy people, the e-book is an ideal choice due to the fact that it would send people brief notifications of news on their mobile phone or laptop, hence won’t lead to time-consuming to go outside and buy newspapers. Moreover, online newspapers have made it a graphic, detailed description and information that could bring readers a crystal-clear observation.

    In conclusion, this transformation is not only beneficial for the financial side but can also reduce the tree-cutting down problem nowadays. It is recommended that the countries should start applying this approach which can help with improving their lands in many aspects.  

Answer 1

"This is a notion with which I completely agree." and "I completely agree with this notion."

The first emphasizes the notion, whereas the other lays emphasis on your opinion. Make sure that you know exactly which one fulfills the question "To what extent do you agree or disagree?".

There is an error in the usage of "not only...but also..."

"This not only exacerbates deforestation but also erosion soil."

"Not only", in this case, placed before the verb "exacerbates" indicated that you were going to mention another verb in addition to "exacerbates", rather than another object in addition to "deforestation".

You can say: "This not only exacerbates deforestation but also erodes soil."

Or alternatively: "This exacerbates not only deforestation but also soil erosion." ( not erosion soil )

This error can also be seen at:

In conclusion, this transformation is not only beneficial for the financial side but can also reduce the tree-cutting down problem nowadays. 

Last,

"In addition, without a doubt, accessing information online is a faster and more convenient method."

The group of words "a faster and more convenient method", in my opinion, is a bit confusing and somewhat wordy since either of the two can imply the other.