IELTs - Task 2 - Opinion - Violence crime among youngsters
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Recent figures show an increase in violent crime among youngsters under the age of 18. Some psychologists claim that the basic reason for this is that children these days are not getting the social and emotional learning they need from parents and teachers.
To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinions?



Some experts attribute the recent upsurge of violent crime rate among juveniles under 18 to the lack of social and emotional knowledge received from their families and schools. From my perspectives, however, those immature violent criminals not only get insufficient learning but also are negatively affected by computer games.

Apparently, the fact that adults leave children get away with themselves is one of the factors that causes youngsters get involved in violent crime. In practice, many couples of parents often shift their responsibility of teaching their children on teachers' shoulders though a large fraction of time children spend at home. Such parents' irresponsibility is likely to get children exposed to social evils including violence. In addition, at schools, not a few lecturers emphasize on students' academic performance but their morality. As a result, students appear to encounter no barrier to involve fightings.

Similarly, the indulgence in computer games poses untold hidden mental hazards in children's mentality in various aspects. In fact, nowadays numerous computer games contain brutal shots. Such violent elements seem to get teenagers accustomed to disturbances, thereby excite their uncontrollable behaviors. Besides, violent games are prone to create both actual and potential rivals among players. Consequently, young players who are hungry for success will fall out and even fight to each other eventually.

In sum, violence crime among youngster seems to become an increasingly annoying issue nowadays. Both parents and teachers should take proactive measures to curb this problem by paying more attention to nurture their children and hindering them from getting access to violent computer games.

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Tớ đọc và thấy bạn viết rất khá về ngữ pháp, nhưng bạn lạc đề rồi. 

Bạn xem bài mẫu này sẽ hiểu nhé:

http://www.ieltsbuddy.com/violent-crime-among-youngsters.html

 Bài của bạn dành cho đề này mới đúng:

Advantages and disadvantages of the computer game.

http://www.english-test.net/forum/ftopic52060.html

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blush lạc đề thật sao? tớ chưa tin đâu. Tớ vào cái link Ielts buddy cậu đưa rồi. Cái bài essay in nghiêng đầu tiên ấy là bài của member nhờ admin chữa. Tớ kéo cuống thấy có bài chữa họ đưa ra point chính ( basic reason) là thiếu sự giảng dạy, kiểm soát từ bố mẹ và thầy cô và thứ 2 là thiếu các biện pháp của chính phủ. Còn bài của tớ là đưa ra 2 point chính là từ bố mẹ và từ games. Đề bài là tình trạng gia tăng bạo lực trong giới trẻ ngày nay, nhiều chuyên gia tâm lí cho rằng đó là do thiếu quan tâm từ gia đình và nhà trường. Bạn có đồng ý hay không? Thi tớ bảo là mình k hoàn toàn đồng ý vì tớ cho rằng có 2 nguyên nhân chính cơ ( giáo dục của gia đình và nhà trg + ảnh hưởng xấu từ games). Còn tớ cũng đọc cái bài advantages và disadvantages of computer games rồi, tớ thấy không giống bài tớ mà. Anyway, cảm ơn góp ý của cậu nhé. Chỉ là tớ thấy chưa đc thuyết phục lắm, tớ cũng gà gà, k có cao nhân chỉ giáo cũng chả biết bài này có lạc đề hay không? 

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