Bài IELTS Task 1 (7-2-2015) [closed]

Question

The bar chart illustrates changes in the proportion of total world population in four nations in 1950, and 2002 and predictions in 2050.

It can be easily seen that the percentage of total world population of China is the highest in among four countries, however, there is a markable increase in the number of India while those of China, the USA and Japan follow a downward trend in over a century period.

Looking at the detail, in 1950, the percentage of total world population of China about 23%. The figures for India, the USA, Japan were much lower, at about 15 %, 6,5 % and around 3%, respectively. In 2002 the proportion of total world population of three nations: China, the USA and Japan decreased steadily to 20%, 5% and 2%, respectively. On the other hand, the figure of Indian population rose markedly to about 17%.

By 2050, it is expected that there will be a stead fall in China and Japan population, the figure for China will be at 15% and about 1 % for Japan, while the USA will not change in the population, its number will be exactly at 5%. At the same time, the percentage of total world population of India is predicted to increase gradually to around 19%.

Answer 1

 

The bar chart illustrates changes in the proportion of total world population in four nations in 1950, and 2002 and predictions in 2050.

It can be easily seen that the percentage of total world population of China is the highest in among four countries, however, there is a markable increase in the number of India while those of China, the USA and Japan follow a downward trend in over a century period.

Looking at the detail, in 1950, the percentage of total world population of China about 23%. The figures for India, the USA, Japan were much lower, at about 15 %, 6,5 % and around 3%, respectively. In 2002 the proportion of total world population of three nations: China, the USA and Japan decreased steadily to 20%, 5% and 2%, respectively. On the other hand, the figure of Indian population rose markedly to about 17%.

By 2050, it is expected that there will be a stead fall in China and Japan population, the figure for China will be at 15% and about 1 % for Japan, while the USA will not change in the population, its number will be exactly at 5%. At the same time, the percentage of total world population of India is predicted to increase gradually to around 19%.

*****

Paraphase nhiêu hơn

Chú ý dùng thì trong khi viết: population of China is the highes => was;  there is= > were; lỗi này nhiều 

 followed 

China about 23% => China was about 23% 

Sử dụng đấu (,) sau In 2002,

  its => it's

total world population  => Population  

Lower than...

 

 

Comments

Chào bạn

 Cảm ơn bạn đã góp ý cho mình, chỉ ra được những lỗi ngữ pháp cơ bản, mình sẽ nhớ và cẩn thẩn cho lần viết sau.

 Có điều ở bài này khoảng thời gian là 1950-2050 , nên khi dùng câu overall có thể viết thế này được ko?It can be easily seen that the percentage of total world population of China has been highest in among four countries, however, there has been a slight increase in the number of India while those of China, the USA and Japan have followed a downward trend in over a century period.

Mình ko rõ nên dùng thì nào trong câu này, trong câu bạn sửa dùng quá khứ đơn mình nghĩ chưa chuẩn lắm với in over a century, bạn có thể phân tích kỹ hơn được ko để cùng rút kinh nghiệm.

 Thanks.

---

It can be easily seen that the percentage of total world population of China has been highest in among four countries, however, there has been a slight increase in the number of India while those of China, the USA and Japan have followed a downward trend in over a century period.

*********

Ở đây bạn sử dụng "the highest" nên không sử dụng has been được => nên dùng quá khư. Nếu dùng thì has been v-ing nhưng không có highest. Or dùng had the highest

- Between thay cho among.

- there has been slight increasing to ... in India chuẩn hơn.

-China, the USA and Japan have been decreasing or had been v-ing.

- a downward => không sử dung a.

- Period là được rồi không dùng dung century period vì period là khoảng thời gian rồi.

- Ở giai đoạn nay (1950-2050) là kéo dài từ quá khứ đến hiện tại và tương lai nữa nên bạn có thế sử dụng thì have been + v-ing or had been + ving or chi tra trước năm 2015 là quá khứ và sau đó dung tương lai to be going to.

---

Cảm ơn bạn đã phân tích giúp mình.

Lần sau tiếp tục sửa giúp mình nhé. Thanks