Some people think that detailed criminal description on newspaper and TV has bad influences, so this kind of information should be restricted on the media. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Question

In recent day, one of tactics of mass media to attract audience’s notice is using detailed report about crime. Some people proposed that this kind of information should be strictly controlled, if not prohibited. In my opinion, I tend to totally agree with this. There are two reasons for my perspective.

First and foremost, It can not deny that this information influences badly to children, who lack of knowledge and awareness. In this day, the children are easy to access information thanks to information technology development. Due to vulnerable mentality and lack of ample experience, they can not protect themselves out of this bad information and can simulate it. Seriously, if the children read or watch too much criminal report which describes in detail, it can be seem as normal ways of behaving and they can use it to handle problem in the future.  

One thing which is equally important is that describing criminal too detail are similar to teaching would-be crime how to deal with in the similar case in the future. Although original purpose of criminal describe is warn people against offence and teach them how to defend, but crime can learn from it. They not only learn about the way police investigate but also the way the others do criminal thing. The latest research show that majority of crime learn criminal skills and even policy’s detective from TV program and newspaper stories about criminal case.

To summarise, media violence, including the detailed picturing of criminal has a bad influence to society. Legislation should be public to strictly control it, if not ban, and minimize the drawback of this kind of information.

Answer 1

if not prohibited: cho mnhi2 hỏi tại sao mẹnh đề này ko có chủ ngủ ạ?

lack of knowledge and awareness b: lack là động từ thì ko cần dùng of nha bạn.

In this day: dùng in these day hay hơn nha.

the children are easy to access information thanks to information technology development.  Mình  có thề góp ý cho ben6L It is easy for children to access information because of the development of information technology.

 protect themselves out of  : bạn xem lại protect hình như ko đi chung với out of nha.

Mình chỉ xem được 1 ít, bạn tham khảo nha

Answer 2

- Although original purpose of criminal describe is warn people against offence and teach them how to defend, but crime can learn from it.- Wrong grammar. But and althought are synonyms. You only use one. However, I suggest you should be used Althought

Rewrite- Although original purpose of criminal describe is warn people against offence and teach them how to defend, crime can learn from it.

Kind of information- lặp từ, bạn có thể thay đổi bằng contents.

Lack of .... thay bằng is lack of....

Ngoài ra, bạn có thể sử dụng một số từ liên quan có nghĩa là lack: insufficiency,deficiency.

Mình chỉ có thể góp ý một số như thế. Khi nào mình phát hiện thêm sẽ up lên tiếp. Good luck