ip.chuawriting
Post bài mới

Lưu ý: Check bài viết với Grammarly trước để tránh lỗi đơn giản! Click banner dưới đây để check


Chúng mình đang tuyển CTV chữa bài CÓ TRẢ PHÍ - các bạn có thể apply ở đây: "https://forms.gle/cpVjgt2TggRyVckHA"
Website Chuawritingmienphi là forum chữa bài miễn phí, được chữa từ chính cộng đồng học IELTS.
Các bạn xem bài chữa mẫu tại "http://bit.ly/baichuaW-demo"
Đối với các bài chữa thiếu nghiêm túc sẽ được kiểm duyệt và BAN tài khoản của học viên đó.
Bắt đầu nhận xét ở mục "Bài chưa có góp ý" để bắt đầu kiếm point nhé :)

3.5k Bài viết

4.8k Góp ý

2.5k bình luận

109k thành viên

In some countries, many people think that it is essential to invest a large amount of money on building new rail lines for every fast trains. Nevertheless, others insist on having existing public transportation systems innovated. I personally think that we had better do both if possible, but in case a country just has one choice, then improving the existing ones is more necessary.

 

On the one hand, the construction of new railway lines will definitely be beneficial to many people. Thanks to these fast trains, we can travel from a place to another in a short time. As a result, people who live far away from their workplace do not necessarily pay for a renting house anymore. Instead, they can take advantage of their free time to stay connected to their family and beloved ones. For instance, in Vietnam, a lot of people from the countryside have to immigrate to big cities for the sake of good study conditions as well as job opportunities. Unfortunately, they are facing up to a bunch of problematic issues related to finance such as the increase of tuition fee or renting house price. In this circumstance, if there was a railway lines system running from their countryside to the city, they would no longer have to be concerned about those expensive costs of living.

 

On the other hand, the government in some countries, especially the poor ones should pay attention to the improvement of existing public transport. I believe that it is unreasonable to construct any new transportation system without innovating low-qualified existing public ones. Because the cost for innovating an old one is always much lower than constructing a new one. Moreover, the government can save some money for investments in other fields like education, medical, economics,... of the country. They can still set a goal for the future when they have got enough conditions in terms of money and other factors, the new construction can be done successfully.

 

In conclusion, rich countries should consider both the construction of new rail lines and the improvement of existing public transport. On the contrary, poor countries had better set a priority on innovating the old public transport.

 
Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã hỏi trong Opinion bởi (6 điểm)
share bài về Wall để xem lại ===>

Xin vui lòng đăng nhập hoặc đăng ký để góp ý bài viết này.

1 góp ý

+1 phiếu
In some countries, many people think that it is essential to invest a large amount of money IN building new rail lines for every fast trains-> TRAINS. Nevertheless, others insist on having existing public transportation systems innovated. I personally think that we had better do both if possible, but in case a country just has one choice, then improving the existing ones is more necessary.


On the one hand, the construction of new railway lines will definitely be beneficial to many people. Thanks to these fast trains, we can travel from a place to another in a short time. As a result, people who live far away from their workplace do not necessarily pay for a renting house anymore. Instead, they can take advantage of their free time to stay connected to their family ->FAMILIES  and beloved ones. For instance, in Vietnam, a lot of people from the countryside have to immigrate to big cities for the sake of good study conditions as well as job opportunities. Unfortunately, they are facing up to a bunch of problematic issues related to finance such as the increase IN tuition fee or (renting house)-> RENTAL price. In this circumstance, if there was a railway lines->LINE system running from their countryside to the city, they would no longer have to be concerned about those expensive costs of living.


On the other hand, the government in some countries, especially the poor one should pay attention to the improvement of existing public transport. I believe that it is unreasonable to construct any->SOME new transportation SYSTEMS without innovating low-qualified existing public ones. Because the cost for innovating an old one is always much lower than constructing a new one. Moreover, the government can save (some) money for investments in other fields like education, HEALTH CARE, economics-> ECONOMY,... of the country. They can still set a goal for the future when they have got enough conditions in terms of money and other factors, the new construction can be done successfully.


In conclusion, rich countries should consider both the construction of new rail lines and the improvement of existing public transport. On the contrary, poor countries had better set a priority on innovating the old public transport.

*Phần in hoa là mình sửa nha. Góp ý của riêng mình thôi. Bài viết cực hay luôn, hầu như chỉ sai ở mấy chi tiết nhỏ.
Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã góp ý bởi (93 điểm)
Cảm ơn cậu nha

Update: Từ 30/4 Điểm bạn tích lũy được trên CWMP sẽ dùng để đổi quà (vé xem CGV (100 điểm/1 vé, thẻ cào điện thoại 150 điểm/thẻ 50k, khóa học IELTS Online (300 điểm/khóa 3 tháng)
Đăng ký quy đổi điểm tại: Form đổi điểm lấy quà"

Bắt đầu nhận xét ở mục "Bài chưa có góp ý" để bắt đầu kiếm Điểm nhé :)

Tham khảo các bài viết tương tự

...