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  Veganism is favor of modern life due to various profits. Although I agree with this statement, this also creates harmful effects because of the following reasons.

   First and foremost is the advantages of being vegetarian as it brings high- quality healthy, declining dangerous diseases and a comfortable spirit. Vegetarians are often active to join in outside activities more than non-vegetarians. Specifically, vegetables and nuts also keep fit and avoid some diseases such as obesity, diabetes, etc. Moreover, veganism extends life-span. Vegetarians will have a happy life from then onwards.

   Nevertheless, improper vegetarianism will lead to serious consequences such as tired body and lack of nutrients.For a long time with eating wrong ways, their body will appear some signs such as poor skin, dried hair and then people do not want to do anything and have a sick. For example, young people is growing with veganism wrongly, they will not intelligent enough to learn everything.

   Last but not least, veganism will be better if people use a reasonable diet and they will reach some benefits above. For teenagers, veganism is not neccessary to their health and complete growth. People who over 30 years old should have veganism to protect their health.

   From all the reasons above, it can be concluded that veganism is good or bad, it depends on how to carry out themselves. To spread benefits of veganism, people should resreach information carefully and practice right ways.  

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 I love the way you present the ideas and your knowledge about veganism 

These are few mistakes in your essay

In your opening 

Veganism is favor of modern life due to various profits. Although I agree with this statement, this also creates harmful effects because of the following reasons. (Nowadays, veganism is considered a healthy lifestyle. However, this may not be suitable in some case. In my opinion, I think we should combine food scientifically get a healthy life )

For example, young people is growing with veganism wrongly, they will not intelligent enough to learn everything. (For example, young people are growing with veganism wrongly, they will not intelligent enough to learn everything.)

For teenagers, veganism is not neccessary to their health and complete growth. (For teenagers, veganism is not  necessary for their health and complete growth.)

To spread benefits of veganism, people should resreach information carefully and practice right ways. (To spread benefits of veganism, people should research  information carefully and practice right ways. )

 From all the reasons above, it can be concluded that veganism is good or bad, it depends on how to carry out themselves (From all the reasons above, it can not conclude that veganism is good or bad, it depends on how to carry out themselves )

 

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Update: Từ 30/4 Điểm bạn tích lũy được trên CWMP sẽ dùng để đổi quà (vé xem CGV (100 điểm/1 vé, thẻ cào điện thoại 150 điểm/thẻ 50k, khóa học IELTS Online (300 điểm/khóa 3 tháng)
Đăng ký quy đổi điểm tại: Form đổi điểm lấy quà"

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