IELTS TASK 2 (Complete IELTS band 4-5) Some people say that living in a high-rise apartment
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imageSome people say that living in a high-rise apartment block is a lonely experience because there is no community spirit. Others say that people who live in high-rise apartments have a much better sense of community than those live in houses.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The shortage of land and increasing urbanization, many high-rise buildings are being constructed. Although some citizens believe that staying in skyscraper apartments has limit interaction due to less communication with other people while others think this lifestyle have much greater socialization rather than living in houses. This essay will discuss both sides of living in a high-rise apartments block.

To begin, high-rise building has its disadvantages. People who live in apartments have no sense of community. For instance, the dweller is busy with their own business since their working time exceeding twelve hours a day. This circumstances create the residents more selfish and ignore the surroundings. They do not have a chance to communicate with their neighbors while those who live in houses occupant do that. Tower block residents do not even know who their neighbors are.

However, living in the block of flats have many advantages. Firstly,  people who live in high-rise buildings have a sense of happiness. Thanks to public facilities such as garden, swimming pool and function rooms; people can go to the garden to relax and it also a good chance for them to get acquaintance with apartment dweller. Secondly, apartment inhabitant can be sociable. Because tower blocks consist of many rooms which are filled with occupants who come from diverse culture. For everyone who is keen on making communication with strange denizen, this occasion can increase the knowledge about the traditional custom and behavior of the neighbor by arranging a meeting and cooking together in the weekend, for example. Automatically, the relationship among the dwellers can be built easily and there is no one who becomes lonely.

In conclusion, living in a high-rise apartment block can be a lonely experience. However, it depends on the type of people who live in them. In my opinion, high-rise living is just rewarding socially as living in a house occupant.

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The shortage of land and increasing urbanization, many high-rise buildings are being constructed. =>> due to the shortage ...

apartments block =>> apartment blocks

This circumstances create the residents =>> make the residents

the dweller is busy => dwellers are busy

Automatically, the relationship among the dwellers can be built easily and there is no one who becomes lonely =>> who feels lonely and isolated.

apartment inhabitantS

get aquaintance with =>> get acquainted with 

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The shortage of land and increasing urbanization, many high-rise buildings are being constructed [w1]. Although some citizens believe that staying in skyscraper apartments has limit interaction due to less communication with other people while others think this lifestyle have much greater socialization rather than living in houses [w2]. This essay will discuss both sides of living in a high-rise apartments block. [w3]

To begin, high-rise building has its disadvantages[w4]. People who live in apartments have no sense of community[w5]. For instance, the dweller is busy with their own business since their working time exceeding twelve hours a day [w6]. This circumstances create the residents more selfish and ignore the surroundings[w7]. They do not have a chance to communicate with their neighbors while those who live in houses occupant do that[w8]. Tower block residents do not even know who their neighbors are[w9]. 

However, living in the block of flats have many advantages[w10]. Firstly,  people who live in high-rise buildings have a sense of happiness[w11]. Thanks to public facilities such as garden, swimming pool and function rooms; people can go to the garden to relax and it also a good chance for them to get acquaintance with apartment dweller[w12]. Secondly, apartment inhabitant can be sociable[w13]. Because tower blocks consist of many rooms which are filled with occupants who come from diverse culture[w14]. For everyone who is keen on making communication with strange denizen, this occasion can increase the knowledge about the traditional custom and behavior of the neighbor by arranging a meeting and cooking together in the weekend, for example[w15]. Automatically, the relationship among the dwellers can be built easily and there is no one who becomes lonely. [w16]

In conclusion, living in a high-rise apartment block can be a lonely experience. [w17]However, it depends on the type of people who live in them[w18]. In my opinion, high-rise living is just rewarding socially as living in a house occupant. [w19]

 

Một số synonym của high-rise apartments

  • High-rise house
  • High-rise building
  • Skyscraper
  • tower

Một số synonym của people

  • citizens
  • inhabitants
  • civilians
  • residents

 

 

[w2] thừa từ whileà nên là dấu phẩy thì đúng hơn nhằm ngăn cách 2 mệnh đề câu ghép

[w5] Câu viết quá chắc chắn: People who live in apartments have no sense of community à People who live in apartments often have no sense of community

[w7] từ hạn định this đi với danh từ số ít : This circumstances à these circumstances

Tránh câu viết quá chắc chắn nên thêm trước động từ : can/ought to/ often/ be likely to/tend to/might

This circumstances create the residents more selfish and ignore the surroundings

[w8] Cách diễn tả hơi rối: có thể viết lại như sau

Compared to people living in homes, people living in high-rise buildings often do not have the opportunity to interact with their neighbors.

[w12] thiếu động từ sau it

it also a good chance for them to get acquaintance with apartment dweller à it is

[w13] [w14] - dùng sai liên từ because. Dùng dấu phẩy thay vì dấu chấm

  • rút gọn mệnh đề quan hệ: many rooms which are filled with à many rooms filled by

[w15] khi viết câu nên ngắn gọn

communicating with others can expand the knowledge of the diversity of cultures in the world

 

 [w16]  Automaticallyà As a result,

 

[w18] giới từ : it depends on the type of people who live in them à it depends on the type of people who live with them

 

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