“One of the strongest influences on youngsters today is that of their peers.” Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
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As the proverb goes ‘’Tell me who is your friend and I will tell you who you are’’. Recently, the issue of whether or not the youth is strongly affected by their peers has been in the limelight and has aroused wide concern in the public. After pondering this question on many occasions, I finally reached the opinion that friends are among the most influential factors on youngsters and my detailed analysis will be given in this writing.

      What takes my precedence is the consecutive exposure to friends. Indeed, children spend most of their time at school, where they meet their friends and communicate with each other. It is common conception that children are easily influenced by their surroundings, thus the prospect of being impacted by the friends is inevitable. Furthermore, friendship is an internal part of youngsters’ life, that is, friend is one of the most important people to the youth. Therefore, the young are likely to share their secrets and problems to their close peers, thus being given advice on their problems. As a result, their ideas and belief are strongly impacted by friends.

     At the second analysis, it is undeniable that the typical personalities of the young are curiosity and imitative propensity. As the matter of fact, youngsters usually take an interest in exploring such new things as places, clothes or even lifestyles. According to my mentioning above, the youth spend most of their time with friends, hence they would see their friends doing new things and want to do exactly the same ones. For example, the trend of wearing stripe pants, which is now very regnant among the juveniles was set by those characteristics of children. They see their peers wearing it so they also want to try. As the result, more and more people follow the trend making it more influential on other youngsters. Irrefutably, the young receive a lot of influence from their surrounding friends.

      In a nutshell, in accordance with highly exposure and typical characteristics, I hold an unshakeable belief that the youngsters stand a great likelihood to be impacted by their friends.
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Đoạn mở đầu khá hay, mình góp ý xíu nhé

As the proverb goes ‘’Tell me who is your friend and I will tell you who you are’’. Recently, the issue of whether... --> Câu đầu tiên chưa phải là 1 câu, vì có từ As. Có thể sửa thành There is a well known proverb...

 What takes my precedence is the consecutive exposure to friends. Indeed, children spend most of their time at school, where they meet

Đoạn dưới có thể dùng "Firstly" thay vì "What takes my precendence" vì cụm từ này mình chưa thấy xuất hiện ở đâu 

 friend is one of the most important... --> friends are

rrefutably, the young receive a lot of influence from their surrounding friends. --> the young receives

Đoạn 2 cũng hay, mình bổ sung thêm là có thể mention: "Peers could be friends of same age, same school, could come from the similar background and therefore easier to sympathize, which is a great factor contributing to youngsters following them"

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Thanks a lot <3 góp ý của bạn cũng hợp lý đó :D mình sẽ sửa :D

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