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In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

Some people believe that in many countries , teenagers should take a gap year for working or traveling before going to tertiary schools . While they could gain a variety of benefits by doing kind of this scheme , there are drawbacks for young people who choose to do this.
 
There are several reasons why I would agree to take a break . Firstly , teenagers could be perceived valuable experiences which you are not studied at school  and enhance their soft-skills .  In addition , traveling also help them to explore new cultures as well as exclusive architectures which is not exist in their country . For example , i have visited to Japan for 3 months  and I have a chance to see Japanese living and cultures  are radically different from Vietnam so I have learned lots of things from that trip.Secondly , young people would have more time to clarify their future and choose appropriate job .In actual fact , It is easier for them to definite what they actually want to do for almost adults life .
 
On the other hand , there are undoubtedly disadvantages  for taking a year off . By wasting twelve months on working or traveling instead of studying at university , a graduated process of teenagers is slower than that of their peers. Moreover , there are more job opportunities for people who graduated ealier than others and it is faster to them for getting a promotion . As a result , taking a gap year could be extremely negative aspect for high school leavers .
 
In conclusion ,  there are pros and cons of traveling or working for a year before getting a higher education.
 
Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã hỏi 1 Tháng 8 trong Discussion bởi henryhai221 (0 điểm)
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Some people believe that in many countries, teenagers should take a gap year for working or travelling before going to tertiary schools. While they could gain a variety of benefits by doing kind of this scheme, there are drawbacks for young people who choose to do this.
 
There are several reasons why I would agree to take a break. Firstly, teenagers could be perceived valuable experiences which you are not studied at school and enhance their soft-skills .  In addition(Additionally) , travelling also helps them to explore new cultures as well as exclusive architectures which is(do) not exist in their country . For example, I have visited to Japan for 3 months  and I have a chance to see Japanese living and cultures (which) are radically different from Vietnam so I have learned lots of things from that trip.Secondly, young people would have more time to clarify their future and choose (an) appropriate job .In actual fact, it is easier for them to definite(define) what they actually want to do for almost adults life .
 
On the other hand , there are undoubtedly disadvantages for taking a year off . By wasting twelve months on working or traveling instead of studying at university , a graduated process of teenagers is slower than that of their peers. Moreover , there are more job opportunities for people who graduated earlier than others and it is faster to(for) them for(to) getting a promotion . As a result, taking a gap year could be extremely  negative aspect for high school leavers(dropouts) .
 
In conclusion,  there are pros and cons of travelling or working for a year before getting a higher education.

*I think your essay might be around band 5.0
Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã góp ý 2 Tháng 8 bởi Mario Martin (13 điểm)
0 phiếu
Some people believe that in many countries , teenagers should take a gap year for working or traveling before going to tertiary schools . While they could gain a variety of benefits by doing kind of this scheme , there are drawbacks for young people who choose to do this.
 
There are several reasons why I would agree to take a break . Firstly , teenagers could be perceived valuable experiences which you are not studied at school  and enhance their soft-skills .  In addition ( thiếu to )  , traveling also help them to explore new cultures as well as exclusive architectures which is not exist in their country . For example, ( Dấu , sát vào )  i have visited to Japan for 3 months  and I have a chance to see Japanese living and cultures  are radically different from Vietnam so I have learned lots of things from that trip.Secondly , young people would have more time to clarify their future and choose appropriate job .In actual fact , It is easier for them to definite what they actually want to do for almost adults life .
 
On the other hand , there are undoubtedly disadvantages  for taking a year off . By wasting twelve months on working or traveling instead of studying at university , a graduated process of teenagers is slower than that of their peers. Moreover , there are more job opportunities for people who graduated ealier than others and it is faster to them for getting a promotion . As a result , taking a gap year could be extremely negative aspect for high school leavers .
 
In conclusion ,  there are pros and cons of traveling or working for a year before getting a higher education.
 
Góp ý :
a) Còn sai nhiều chính tả  .
b) Kết bài còn ngắn quá .  Nếu được bạn có thể nêu thêm '' In my view people need to have some solutions to reduce these problems and to fully get its benefits ''

 

Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã góp ý 3 Tháng 8 bởi Tân Thanh (7 điểm)

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