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Bài IELTS Task 2 chủ đề WORK: It is better for people to be unemployed than to be employed but they do not enjoy. Do you agree or disagree?

People nowadays pay much more attention to their inner satisfaction. It is sometimes claimed that people prefer quitting their unsatisfying job to remain in that position. In my opinion, I partly agree with this views for various reasons as now will be discussed.

On one hand, continually doing something unenjoyable affects people working attitude and their enthusiasm. They will feel tired and bored of doing uninteresting daily tasks and do not have motivated to do their work perfectly. For example, my friend who likes architecture but she studied medicine and became a doctor just because of her parents’ expectation usually looks depressed and exhausted after work especially after night shifts. She does not care about her patients, she treats them the same as each other. Therefore, these people always aspire to get a better and more suitable career. On unemployment gives them a chance to take a break and learn new things, sharpen their skills and have opportunities to do their dream jobs.

On the other hand, being employment still has a constant benefit. Firstly, we will have salary each month which satisfies our basic need such as the food, bills, transports and entertainment activities. Secondly, instead of wasting time doing nothing people can gain great experience and emerge their curriculum vitae when they are working. Thirdly, people may realize that their work is interesting after getting familiar with it. For instance, after graduate, my sister got a job which was different with her major. She felt so stress to face with the new job when started but after several weeks, she was getting familiar with her works and then totally fell in love with it.

In conclusion, having an interesting job is everyone’s dream but sometimes we have to accept the situation unsatisfying and find out our enthusiasm later.
Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã hỏi 12 Tháng 7 trong Opinion bởi hmngoc (0 điểm)
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2 góp ý

+2 phiếu
1. " situation satisfying " --> unsatisfying situation

2. " after graduate " --> after graduating

3. " was differrent with " --> was different from

4. " has a constant benefit " --> has some constant benefits

5 . "expectation" --> expectations

Nhìn chung bài bạn viết rất tốt, có sử dụng nhiều cấu trúc hay, tuy vậy còn vài lỗi nhỏ ( à đừng cho chi tiết cá nhân nhiều quá ). Đây là những góp ý của mình. Nếu có sai sót gì, bỏ qua cho mình nhá ^^
Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã góp ý 16 Tháng 11 bởi minhtriet2604 (13 điểm)
+1 phiếu

Theo mình không nên dùng Nowadays ở câu đầu vì nó khá common word

"people prefer quitting their unsatisfying job to remaining in that position"

I partly agree with this view for various reasons as now will be discussed ( nên thay bằng kiểu khác )

On the one hand( nên để the ), continually doing something unenjoyable affects people working attitude and their enthusiasm ( câu topic quá phức tạp , nếu mà diễn giải kĩ ra thì là continually doing something which is unenjoyable affects people's working attitude and their enthusiasm

 For example, my friend who likes architecture but she studied medicine and became a doctor just because of her parents’ expectation usually looks depressed and exhausted after work especially after night shifts ==> quá là rối rắm, bạn nên ngắt ý dễ hơn, thực sự nó rất unclear , dễ bị nhầm thành just because ... looks depressed ( chủ ngữ của nó là my friend ở tận đầu câu )

 being in employment/ being employed  still has some constant benefits ..

our basic needs

after graduation

 

 

 

Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã góp ý 17 Tháng 11 bởi frankovidaxt (9 điểm)

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