ip.chuawriting
Post bài mới
Thành viên với 10 points trở lên sẽ được sửa bài bởi Team Writing 7.5 từ IELTS Planet - Học IELTS Online.
Bắt đầu nhận xét ở mục "Bài chưa có góp ý" để bắt đầu kiếm point nhé.

2.1k Bài viết

3k Góp ý

2k bình luận

13.7k thành viên

International travel has many advantages to both travelers and the country visited. Does the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? International travel is on the increase in every corner of the world which has provided lots of benefits for both travelers and the country visited. This has arouse a debatable topic recently since some are of the opinion that international travel do more harm than good whilst others are in the favor of the opposite view. From my view point, I prefer the latter opinion. Three reasons below will illustrate my view.

First and foremost, it is an undeniable fact that international travel goes hand in hand with economic growth since it not only creates millions of jobs but also elevates tourist industry as well. The most familiar example of this is countries which have outstanding tourist attractions often has its economic status increased 10% in a few years in comparison with countries which don't have ones, according to well-documented data,since international travel brings about huge gross profit for travel agencies. Moreover, international travel recruits a huge amount of employees every year and often ensures a lucrative income which results in the decrease of unemployment rate. In one word, international travel have a great contributions to the economic growth in various aspects. Another reason to stimulate international travel may be supported by the fact that travelers can take advantage of it by acknowledging not only diverse cultures but potential business contracts as well. As a matter of fact, tourists have inevitably witnessed and later obtained general knowledge from history to customs by experiencing cultural cross in their visits. Take giving compliments as an example. In Japan, thumb up stands for excellent performance whilst in Indonesia it doesn't. Moreover, international travel also aids businessmen to reach their full potentials. For instance, an adequate fishing trade circulation may catch the eye of a French businessman who is looking for one on his vacation in Japan. Therefore, it seems reasonable that travelers benefits a lot from international travel. Some of my opponents claim that international travel has its shortcomings since it may have negative influence not only on the environment but on society as well. This has some merits on the surface; however, it should be borne in mind that government has taken strict international travel regulations into practice recently which leads to the fact that rarely can international tourists either violate the law or commit social vices. As a result, international travel has its advantages outweigh its disadvantages. In conclusion, international travel stimulates economic development and benefits travelers in various ways. Therefore, the economy and travel experience cannot be upgraded unless international travel is encouraged to become a trend in the future.
Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã hỏi trong Opinion bởi (0 điểm)
share bài về Wall để xem lại ===>

Xin vui lòng đăng nhập hoặc đăng ký để góp ý bài viết này.

1 góp ý

0 phiếu

Form: International travel has many advantages to both travelers and the country visited. Does the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

International travel is on the increase in every corner of the world which has provided lots of benefits for both travelers and the country visited. This has aroused a debatable topic recently since some are of the opinions that international travel do more harm than good whilst others are in the favor of the opposite view. From my view point, I prefer the latter opinion and three reasons below will illustrate my view. (phần này trong đề không nêu ra hai cái opinion này nên introduce như thế này là không hợp lí)

First and foremost, it is an undeniable fact that international travel goes hand in hand with economic growth since it not only creates millions of jobs but also elevates tourist industry as well. The most familiar example of this is many countries which have outstanding tourist attractions often has its economic status increased 10% in a few years in comparison with countries which don't have ones, according to well-documented data,since international travel brings about huge gross profit for travel agencies. Moreover, international travel recruits a huge / an enormous amount of employees every year and often ensures a lucrative income which results in the decrease of unemployment rate. In one word, international travel have  a great contributions to the economic growth in various aspects.

Another reason to stimulate international travel may be supported by the fact that travelers can take advantage of it by acknowledging not only diverse cultures but potential business contracts as well. As a matter of fact, tourists have inevitably witnessed and later obtained general knowledge from history to customs by experiencing cultural cross in their visits. Taking giving compliments as an example. In Japan, thumb up stands for excellent performance whilst in Indonesia it doesn't. (phần này nên nói thêm ảnh hưởng của cái thông tin này đối với quan hệ, giao tiếp hay gì đó). Moreover, international travel also aids businessmen to reach their full potentials from new relationships with new partners in the world. For instance, an adequate fishing trade circulation in Japan may catch the eye of a French businessmans who is a CEOs of an enormous chain of supermarkets in France when they are spending his vacation in there. And thanks to that, a huge number of fish from Japan can be exported to France which will have many marvelous influence on the national enconomic.  Therefore, it seems reasonable that travelers will bring many benefits to the country visited from international travel. Some of my opponents claim that international travel has its shortcomings since it may have negative influence not only on the environment but on society as well. This has some merits on the surface; however, it should be borne in mind that government has taken strict international travel regulations into practice recently which leads to the fact that rarely can international tourists either violate the law or commit social vices(phần nó không được rõ ý). As a result, international travel has its advantages outweigh its disadvantages.

In conclusion, international travel stimulates economic development and benefits travelers in various ways. Therefore, the economy and travel experience cannot be upgraded unless international travel is encouraged to become a trend in the future.

Nên bó luôn phần negative đi vì nó quá ngắn và thiếu ý. Cách lập luận và làm bài vẫn còn rất lủng củng, vốn từ và ngữ pháp đều hạn hẹp, cần luyện tập thêm. Chúc bạn thành công

Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã góp ý bởi (90 điểm)

Tips: Thành viên với 10 points trở lên sẽ được sửa bài bởi Team Writing 7.5 :)
Bắt đầu nhận xét ở mục "Bài chưa có góp ý" để bắt đầu kiếm point nhé :)

Tham khảo các bài viết tương tự

...