ip.chuawriting
Post bài mới
Thành viên với 10 points trở lên sẽ được sửa bài bởi Team Writing 7.5 từ IELTS Planet - Học IELTS Online.
Bắt đầu nhận xét ở mục "Bài chưa có góp ý" để bắt đầu kiếm point nhé.

2.2k Bài viết

3.1k Góp ý

2k bình luận

13.7k thành viên

Tracffic accidents are on the rise these day in Viet Nam. Thousands of people are killed by accidents each year. Most of the accidents are caused injuires or either worse death.Research have found that  The poor road conditions and awareness of obeying traffic laws are causes of road accidents in Viet Nam. In my opinion, i think the goverment need offer a few solutions to deal with thiese problems

The first problem is the poor road conditions. To begin with, the transport intrastucture inadequacy can be a cause that leads accidents.For example, mixed traffic status  between all transport vehicles such ascars,lorries bikes motocycles and long vehicles; between drivers and pedestrains; and railway with road .Continuously, narrow road,building materials in cofusion, especially ''block house'' are erected during  reparing roads,etc,..are all elements of traffic jams and losing of driver's sight.In addition, pothles, dirty and swapy road surface are causes of rains or poor conditions of roads.

Beside, awareness of obeying traffic laws is the most important cause.Most of the accidents are caused by inexperienced drivers.many people drive too fast and use alcohol while driving. It makes dazzled and lose their memory so can't control to driving.Mereover,they use phone,listen to music or joke when to drive.This makes lose their attention that the accident occuries easily.

Next, don't wear helmet,exceed the speed limit or don't stop when read light turn on.All are acts of violation traffic and  is the second problem.

In short, it's about time the goverment should concern for investment to upgrade the mordern road traffic system and raise people's sense of responbility in implement traffic laws on attending traffic.

 

Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã hỏi trong Other bởi (11 điểm)
share bài về Wall để xem lại ===>

Xin vui lòng đăng nhập hoặc đăng ký để góp ý bài viết này.

1 góp ý

0 phiếu

Tracffic accidents are on the rise these day in Viet Nam. Thousands of people are killed by accidents each year. Most of the accidents are caused injuires or either worse death.Research have found that  The poor road conditions and awareness of obeying traffic laws are causes of road accidents in Viet Nam.

-> Phần này tớ nghĩ cậu nên viết lại. Nó không được liền mạch và làm tớ không hiểu cái topic của cả bài này đâu. Tớ khuyên cậu nên học theo phương pháp thầy Simon để có cái nhìn cụ thể và tự sửa được bài của mình. Tớ thì trình cx bình thường thôi nên k dám sửa lại cho cậu :"> (thông cảm nhé!!!)

In my opinion, i think the goverment need offer a few solutions to deal with thiese problems.

-> Tớ có đọc bên dưới thấy cậu có đề cập cả lý do mà thì phần này cx nên nói chút nhá.

The first problem is the poor road conditions. To begin with, the transport intrastucture inadequacy can be a cause that leads accidents.For example, mixed traffic status  between all transport vehicles such ascars,lorries bikes motocycles and long vehicles; between drivers and pedestrains; and railway with road .Continuously, narrow road,building materials in cofusion, especially ''block house'' are erected during  reparing roads,etc,..are all elements of traffic jams and losing of driver's sight.In addition, pothles, dirty and swapy road surface are causes of rains or poor conditions of roads.

Beside, awareness of obeying traffic laws is the most important cause.Most of the accidents are caused by inexperienced drivers.many people drive too fast and use alcohol while driving. It makes dazzled and lose their memory so can't control to driving.Mereover,they use phone,listen to music or joke when to drive.This makes lose their attention that the accident occuries easily.

Next, don't wear helmet,exceed the speed limit or don't stop when read light turn on.All are acts of violation traffic and  is the second problem.

In short, it's about time the goverment should concern for investment to upgrade the mordern road traffic system and raise people's sense of responbility in implement traffic laws on attending traffic.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thế này nhé, hình như cậu chưa học IELTS đúng không ? vì bài làm của cậu bị lệch lạc form quá. Nhiều lỗi quá,nhưng cái chính là cậu còn chưa viết đúng cấu trúc thì những cái khác cx cứu giúp đc đâu nên là dành một chút thời gian lượn lờ trang mạng và tìm hiểu cấu trúc và cách viết 1 bài văn ielts writing task 2 nhá.

Chúc cậu có một ngày làm việc hiệu quả :D

Theo bạn, bài viết này được bao nhiêu "chấm" ?
đã góp ý bởi (24 điểm)

Tips: Thành viên với 10 points trở lên sẽ được sửa bài bởi Team Writing 7.5 :)
Bắt đầu nhận xét ở mục "Bài chưa có góp ý" để bắt đầu kiếm point nhé :)
...