Some people believe that success in life comes from taking risks or chances. Others believe that success results from careful planning. In your opinion, what does success come from? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. - Chữa Writing miễn phí
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If a person has no opportunity, one’s possibility of success is zero. Nevertheless, it is also difficult for someone to get success without planning carefully, no matter how many chances come to him. It will be more difficult when a well work-out plan is not going on as expected. At that time, an adventure in changing direction timely is very important to be able to achieve successful results. In orther words, success is a combitation between taking risks and making a scheme, namely.

First of all, a certain opportunity is one of the most important factors leading to success. Reality has showed that there are a lot of situations in which they cannot succeed due to lack of chances. For example, a graduate has a plan to open his own business, but his plan requires too many resources. However, if he cannot get help from others people, there is no chance for him to make his plan become real.

Secondly, being well-prepared plays a vital role in one’s success. Without a careful preparation, no one makes use of chances that they recieve. Every year, hundreds of thousands of students try to attend to a desirable university or college. However, only those who have an effective studying plan and follow their plan until the last possible moment can get into universities or colleges they want

Finally, a person also can not have the game in his hand if he does not change the original schedule when something unexcepted happens. For instance, a fashion designer has a plan to oragnize a fashion show outside for his summer fashionable collection next month. The success of  this fashion show depends on the weather so much because It is held outdoor. Unfortunately, according to the forecast before a week, there will be rain on that day. So, choosing an indoor place in stead of the old one  is essential for him to run a fashion parade smoothly.

In conclusion, almost success starts from having a carefull scheduled plan when a chance comes to , but when things go against the plan, it is necessary to find out another way in order to deal with it.
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If a person has no opportunity, one’s possibility of success is zero. Nevertheless, it is also difficult for someone to get success without planning carefully, no matter how many chances come to him. It will be more difficult when a well work-out plan is not going on as expected. At that time, an adventure in changing direction timely is very important to be able to achieve successful results. In orther words, success is a combitation between taking risks and making a scheme, namely.

First of all, a certain opportunity is one of the most important factors leading to success. Reality has showed that there are a lot of situations in which they cannot succeed due to lack of chances. For example, a graduate has a plan to open his own business, but his plan requires too many resources. However, if he cannot get help from others people, there is no chance for him to make his plan become real.

Secondly, being well-prepared plays a vital role in one’s success. Without a careful preparation, no one makes use of chances that they recieve. Every year, hundreds of thousands of students try to attend to a desirable university or college. However, only those who have an effective studying plan and follow their plan until the last possible moment can get into universities or colleges they want

Finally, a person also can not have the game in his hand if he does not change the original schedule when something unexcepted happens. For instance, a fashion designer has a plan to oragnize a fashion show outside for his summer fashionable collection next month. The success of  this fashion show depends on the weather so much because It is held outdoor. Unfortunately, according to the forecast before a week, there will be rain on that day. So, choosing an indoor place in stead of the old one  is essential for him to run a fashion parade smoothly.

In conclusion, almost success starts from having a carefull scheduled plan when a chance comes to , but when things go against the plan, it is necessary to find out another way in order to deal with it.

 

Mình có vài ý thôi

- Nghe nói thi TOEFL thì những bài điểm cao là những bài trên 500 từ, nên bạn cố viết dài hơn một chút

- Mình thích cách sử dụng đa dạng các kiểu câu để present ý tưởng. Nhưng nhiều câu hơi cụt :D

- Phần mở bài hơi rối

- Mình thấy ít có lỗi, chỉ có vài lỗi chính tả (chắc gõ nhanh nên bị), vậy thôi.

- Thesis Statement và Các topic sentences nên có liên kết hơn

- Ở ý Taking risk, mình gợi ý bạn đưa ví dụ Steve Jobs bỏ học đi học Calligraphy và thành công với Apple.

- Ở ý Preparation, mình nhớ có câu của ông tổng thống Mỹ nào đó, đại ý là: nếu tôi chặt một cái cây, tôi sẽ dành mấy tiếng để mài cây rìu.

- Mình học được nhiều điều từ bài của bạn. Cám ơn nhé!

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