Đề thi IELTS - 09/05/2015 - Developments in technology has brought various environmental problems. Some believe that people need to...
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Topic IELTS của tuần này 09/05/2015

Task 1: Table about high School Teacher's salary from 5 countries
Task 2: Developments in technology has brought various environmental problems. Some believe that people need to live simpler lives to solve environmental problems. Others, however, believe technology is the way to solve these problems.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Bài mẫu Band 8.0 cho đề Task 2 tuần này: 09/05/2015 đến từ IPP IELTS

Developments in technology has brought various environmental problems. Some believe that people need to live simpler lives to solve environmental problems. Others, however, believe technology is the way to solve these problems.

Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

 

Some immense environmental problems such as global warming and ozone depletion in Earth’s stratosphere can be ascribed to technological developments. While some people believe that living a simple life can mitigate these problems, I contend that the best measure is green technology.

I firmly believe that environmentally-friendly technology is the best answer to the problems. First, electric or hybrid transport vehicles can reduce the amount of traffic fumes that has been damaging both the biosphere and the atmosphere of Earth. For example, thick layers of smog in Beijing had gradually diminished after most petrol and diesel cars were replaced by electric ones. Second, the use of alternative energy sources such as solar and wind can stop the over-exploitation of fossil fuels, thus reducing the amount of greenhouse gas emission, the main culprit of global warming. Finally, with the latest technological advancements, household facilities that once threatened the environment have become greener. An excellent example of this is that modern refrigerators and air-conditioners do not produce CFC, a type of gas that is proven to be the major catalyst of ozone destruction.

There is a common fallacy that a simple lifestyle can adequately address environmental issues. People may argue that by cutting household and transport energy use, they are making a substantial contribution to environmental protection. However, this method does not stop the massive energy consumption at industrial sites. Some may also claim that not using electricity at home is the right choice, and events such as Earth Hour is an appropriate measure to cut carbon dioxide production. Ironically, the mentioned event is symbolic rather than practical, as most people start to light candles for lighting purpose, an act that produces even more carbon-dioxide than light bulbs do.

All of the existing data provides a concrete foundation that advances of technology should be adopted to tackle environmental problems, while simple ways of life are an ineffective and sometimes counterproductive solution for these problems.

 

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các bạn và admin chữa giúp e với, thank you very much

     There is no doubt that technology is enhanced increasingly. This, however, cause a range of severe issues for environment. While some hold that people should have a less complicating life, others counter that technology is the great method to deal with the environment.

     On the one hand, supporters of the negative impacts of technology believe that if people could live without technology, the Earth would be more secure. Firstly, lessening hi-tech equipment would decrease considerably emission and make a fresh atmosphere. Limiting use air-conditioner which is one of the most significant reasons causing a huge growth in heat of the Earth, for example, could avoid global warming. Furthermore, instead modern transportation, people should commute by uncomplicated vehicles. Certainly, the less people use motor vehicles, the less discharged dirt is.

     On the other hand, those who disagree with the drawback of technology tend to argue that this improvement has a bunch of benefits for the environment. In fact, there are more and more environmental friendly machines, that is, the low quality facilities which can create an enormous harm to the environment would be decreased quickly. This is true of using the electrical car which works by taking advantage of solar energy and so reduce fuel car. Additionally,  many new technology can handle trash and emission from humans. The advancement of nuclear technology is a great example and plays a crucial role in lessening environmental pollution. Nuclear power is created in great quantities by applying high technology and this source reduces strongly the amount of carbon dioxide released into the atmosphere.
     In conclusion, I am convinced that the advanced technology is a great innovation for solving the serious challenges of the environment.
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Sai ngữ pháp nhiều quá bạn ơi + nhiều từ sử dụng không đúng chỗ + thiếu giới từ tùm lum. Bài bạn giống như dịch từ tiếng việt sang tiếng anh ấy. Bạn nên đọc lại bài sau khi viết nhé
cảm ơn bạn nhé, mình se sua lai baif

There is no doubt that technology is enhanced increasinglyhas been increasingly enhanced. This, however, causes a range of severe issues for the environment. While some hold that people should have a less complicating complicated life, others counter that technology is athe great method to deal with the environment.

     On the one hand, supporters of the negative impacts of technology believe that if people could live without technology, the Earth would be more secure. Firstly, lessening hi-tech equipment would would considerably decrease considerably emissions and make for a fresher atmosphere. Limiting the use of air-conditioners, which is one of the most significant reasons causing a huge growth rise in heat the temperature of the Earth, for example, could avoid lessen global warming. Furthermore, instead of modern transportation, people should commute by uncomplicated non – motorized vehicles. Certainly, the less people use motor vehicles, the less discharged dirt is fewer emissions are into the environment.

     On the other hand, those who disagree with the drawback of technology tend to argue that this improvement has a bunch ofseveral benefits for the environment. In fact, there are more and more environmentally friendly machines,. This means thatthat is, the low- quality facilities which that can create an enormous harm to the environment would be decreased quickly. This is true of using the electrical car, which works by taking advantage of solar energy and so reduce fuel cars the need for fuel. Additionally,  many new technologiesy can handle trash and emission from humans. The advancement of nuclear technology is a great example and plays a crucial role in lessening environmental pollution. Nuclear power is created in great quantities by applying high technology, and this source greatly reduces strongly the amount of carbon dioxide released into the atmosphere.
     In conclusion, I am convinced that the advanced technology is a great innovation for solving the serious challenges of facing the environment.

Góp ý:

-         Lưu ý cách dùng mạo từ the. E.g: the environment, the temperature, the need, the use of…. Tuy nhiên, advanced technology, a great method to deal with the environment.

-         Các từ cụm từ thường dùng và được đánh giá cao trong bài viết: lessen, cause a huge rise in, has been increasingly enhanced, non – motorized vehicles, serious challenges facing the environment, instead of+Nound (Instead+ “,”, considerably decrease, greatly reduce, This means ( thay vì “That is,”)

-         Ngoài ra, cũng cần lưu ý lỗi ngữ pháp cơ bản: This causes a range of severe issues...

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Gởi ad bài của mình, góp ý giúp mình nhé 
 

  Over the last few decades, the rate of technology change has been phenomenal, bringing much needed improvements to human life in many ways. While some people believe technology can help to solve our enviromental problems, others view technology as the source of the problem which should be avoided.  

    On the one hand, it is true that environmental pollution is partly caused by scientific inventions. Everyday use of cars and other types of transport, which are powered by the combustion of coals and gasoline, emits an enormous amount of carbon dioxide into the air. In addition, industrial manufaturers dump tons of toxic wastes into, not only the air, but also the water, destroying the marine wildlife. Even worse, industrialisation is happening on a global scale and at a rapid rate. However, the belief that rejecting technology from our daily life could relieve the environmental problems is questionable. It is because the industrial products are now employed in every household, thus the only way to avoid them is to turn civilisation back to the Stone Age.

   On the other hand, I am convinced that technology is the answer to our environmental issues. Most of the technological inventions, which are shown to be detrimental to the ecosystem, have been modified and upgraded into something environmental friendly. For example, solar cars are already in the making, so as to reduce the use of leaded fuel. Biodegradable packaging has been put into use, so that our unused shopping bags can no longer harm our soil. The heat from waste gases emitted from factories are now considered as a usable source of energy. There are undoubtedly more improvements to come, making technologies beneficial to both human and the environment. 

   In conclusion, although some technologies can be harmful to the environments, but their modifications can solve the problems.   

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Over fuel and material consuming manufactures have brought many harmful effects to the environment and to deal with this matter each of us should have a simpler life-style (living style) and promote technological advances that help to tackle these environment problems.

On the one hand, it is believed that each individual needs to have a simple life-style and depends less on technology is one of the best way to protect the global environment. My first suggestion is that everyone should walk or cycle rather than drive cars. This is because the number of cars being manufactured and used is increasing, which causes higher and higher volumes of exhausted gas polluting the air seriously. The second one is that each of us should try to reduce the daily quantity of electricity consumption as an effort to minimize the usage of natural resources such as fossil fuel or nuclear power. It is because the more natural fossil fuel or nuclear power we use the greater green effect that is making the climate hotter and hotter we create. Good ideas and efforts for reducing power consumption should be promoted more and more, such as the annual event called Earth Hour where everyone worldwide is asked to turn lights off for sixty minutes.

On the other hand, I believe the development of technology can make great contribution to protecting the environment. This is can be seen through some good examples: The first, thanks to the recent technological advancement in recycling some types of garbage like used paper, glass or plastic wares into safe and nice products, a noticeable quantity of waste has become useful for man and friendly to the environment as it is not a pollution source as it used to be; The second, many countries in the world have utilized modern technologies to build solar power plants instead of constructing thermal power or diesel power plants which discharge million tons of hazardous gas, smoke and dust each month. It’s obvious that advanced technologies can help us to minimize the volume of garbage and exhaust gas daily polluting the environment.

Aforementioned ideas and samples have suggested best ways to protect the environment for ourselves and our future generations. Those ways include having a simple living style and promoting the environment friendly technologies.

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Mình nghĩ bạn bị lạc đề rồi. Đề bài là discuss both views and give your opinion, chứ không phải là give solutions. Có thể bạn đang viết thể loại freestyle nhưng bài của bạn bị lệch hướng rồi.
Nhiều câu bạn viết cần thêm chấm phẩy vào cho dễ đọc, chứ câu bạn viết dài, đọc qua thấy lủng củng và dài dòng.
Và cuối cùng đọc hết bài bạn, mình vẫn chưa biết opinion của bạn là gì

Điểm mạnh của bài bạn là vốn từ bạn tốt.
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Lần đầu làm bài trên nhóm. minh k biết viết kết thế nào nên nó cụt lủn. có j sai sót mng cứ phang thẳng nhé=)

Technology is defined as the collection of techniques,methods or processes used in the production of goods, services or in the accomplishment of objectives. some people believe the booming development of technology resulted in various environmental problems. in my opinion, technology is the way to solve these problems.

a thousand years ago,people used stone tools to make fire by rubbing a stick with a stone. afterwards,they know about " shame" so they made clothes from leaves, animal skins and turned caves into shelter. later, human had an abundant supply of foods and the discovery of metal, step by step,changed the whole civilization. from that day on, people used metal in every areas: transportation,energyy,agriculture and so on. this shows that the development of technology is envitable and plays an important role in human's living

nevertheless, industrial arts also has bad impacts on everyday life. tons of poison smoke are exhausted from factories which cause acid rain, carbondioxide. not only does it dangerous to people's health but also spoil ozone layer, makes temperature higher and higher. industrial trashes are thrown  into seas, lakes, rivers causing bad pollution. So, is this technology's fault or the expansion of human life? we use technology to develop from stone-age civilization to industrial civilization without caring of environment nor ecosystem. and we are paying flor this

however, we can change the situation before it's too late. many organizations such as UNEP, AFEO are doing postivlely  in changing society. they invented machines which can clean the air, trees which produce more oxygen and the appearance of solar energy  have brought a new decade for factories, companies. As new energy sources like wind, water or solar are becoming poplular, the factories no longer have to use colar or gas energy to maintain their activity. technology is also the solution of transportation and the government are investing more money on bus and underground subway to decrease the rate of using motorbikes or cars. each  bus can hold up to 150 people and the subway declines exhaust fumes in the air.moreover, these public vehicles are cheap, convinient and  reduce traffic jam. many rivers, lakes are in bad polluted condition so the recovery costs so much money and time. industrial arts nowadays only solve a part of the problem, reuse drain water instead of pouring directly into river. there is a kind of fish that eats trash so scientists hope it is a cure for the situation. our soil is polluted as well,because of chemiclas that people use in agriculture can cause poison, contaminate the soil.what can we do today is supply necessary ,organic substances to improve the ability  of holding water and loosening capability of soil

in conclusion, technology will change the face of society

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450 từ :)) dài quá bạn ơi. tóm lại đi. 1 bài ielts tầm 250-300 từ thôi
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ad làm ơn sửa bài hộ em với ạ. mấy cái em tô đậm thì em nghĩ là sai nhưng em lại ko biết cách sửa ạ :( . thank you very much.

 

Advance in technologies brought various problems to natural environment. People argue that abandon technology is the best way to save the environment. I am fundamentally disagree with them while believing green technology is our planet savior.

Firstly, we must acknowledge that pollution is the most obvious consequence of invention. Mean of transportation such as cars and aircrafts released huge amount of emission into our atmosphere. Causing the increasing in average temperature. Another circumstance is that the destruction of aquatic diversity is getting worse and worse for the time being, because of over hunting and the production of fossil fuel such as crude oil and coals. Thus, human productivity causes most serious damages to the earth.

On the other hand, despite those drawbacks, technology also offer the way to save our mother planet called green technology. That focuses on the invention of alternative sources of energy such as wind power and solar energy. It release least greenhouse gases and almost unlimited which it is safer and more suitable to the earth. Furthermore, human beings may no longer dependent on mother-nature products, which mean no more destruction to natural environment. However, people have long journey to reap that achievement. Governments should invest more to develop those technologies in other to save our living environment.

In sum, I fundamentally believe that technology have both detrimental impacts and benefits. Having said that, the way we use its lead to these circumstances. If it had been used more sensible and effectively only the benefits remain. 

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