Hi there. I must say that ur essay is quite good, considering ur wide vocabulary, word use and structure
Yet, there's something that i think u should reconsider
- First, i don't think using ratio here is appropriate, coz it refers to the relationship between two groups ( like the ration of men to women ). If i were you, i would write like this "depicts patterns for the 65-and-over age bracket witnessed in 3 selected nations from 1940 to 2040"
- Second, retiree numbers here is somewhat misleading, since in some countries, retirement age falls between 55 and 60
- Finally, as noun phrases are preferred, i think u should try to use it as much as possible. Besides, u could use "within" when u want to say "less than and equal to"
Hope that my comments can help u a bit