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Thành viên với 10 points trở lên sẽ được sửa bài bởi Team Writing 7.5 từ IELTS Planet - Học IELTS Online.
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It’s true to say that spending much time on television is wasteful than going outside or talking with friends and parents. However, television can give plethora information for people to learn how to behave when they go out society. General speaking, I believe that television does not destroy communication among people as others think, it also benefits everyone.

First, television is a good entertainment source that friends, families can enjoy together. Almost families certainly have at least a television in their house because of its entertaining purposes and ease to access. Thus, it is convenience for people to share this device and enjoy a program together. For example, I can recall the days of the weekend in winter, everybody in my family does not have to work and no one wants to go out of the door due to the cold. Therefore, we often gather on living room, sitting on cozy sofa and watching our favorite gameshow. These are also opportunities for us to communicate with each other about our works and lives.

Second, programs on television can be topics for communicators. It has a broad range of programs for audience to attend. Surely, there are viewers loving a common program and they really want to make friend with someone who can share their idea, feelings about it. We can see that many groups, teams, and social forums have been established where people can discuss on their interesting topics, movies, news, programs. It is difficult for people to find others in common; starting a conversation, however, with a popular movies or musical band on the television could be a perfect approach to other people. I think television effects on everyone’s daily life, we can make it as an advantage to take a part into communities impacted by it.

Finally, television provides essential experiences from what viewers can learn. There are considerable number of channels that bring up educational programs which carefully censored and visualized for spectators to perceive. An instance from me is when I study oversea in Korea. I remember that I have watched a documentary program about this country - its culture, traditional, and manner. Hence, when I lived there, I did not feel confused; moreover, I easily harmonized to the sociality and had many friends in my dorm and classes. Furthermore, television was my best mate which helped me to understand Korean and how to speak with others in this country.

By way of conclusion, based on the arguments explored above, I am of the opinion that in most cases television is actually more beneficial for people to communicate with their friends and families. It is true to say that youth can adversely affected by television, however, parents should be responsible for guiding their children to use television properly.

 

Rating: 7.14
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+1 phiếu

It’s true to say that spending much time on television is wasteful than going outside or talking with friends and parents. However, television can give plethora useful/ necessary information for people to learn how to behave in outside society when they go out society. General speaking, I believe that television does not destroy communication among people as others think, instead it also benefits everyone.

... instead it has a wide range of benefits than disadvantages.

 

By way of conclusion, based on the arguments explored above, I am of the opinion that in most cases television is actually more beneficial for people to communicate with their friends and families. It is true to say that youth can adversely affected by television, however, parents should be responsible for guiding their children to use television properly.

Câu 2 hơi dài.

Góp ý, The negative outcomes of ... should not be underestimated and parents should/ would...

 

Rating: 7.70
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+1 phiếu

t’s true to say that spending much time on television is more wasteful than going outside or talking with friends and parents. However, television can give plethora information for people to learn how to behave when they go out enter society. General speaking, I believe that television does not destroy communication among people as others think, it also benefits everyone.

First, television is a good entertainment source that friends, families can enjoy together. Almost families certainly have at least a television in their house because of its entertaining purposes and ease to access. Thus, it is convenience convenient for people to share this device and enjoy a program together. For example, I can recall the days of the weekend in winter, everybody in my family does not have to work and no one wants to go out of the door due to the cold weather. Therefore, we often gather on in the living room, sitting on the cozy sofa and watching our favorite gameshow. These are also opportunities for us to communicate with each other about our works work and life  lives.

Second, programs on television can be topics for communicators. It has a broad range of programs for audience to attend. Surely, there are viewers loving a common program and they really want to make friend with someone who can share their ideas, feelings about it. We can see that many groups, teams, and social forums have been established places  where people can discuss on their interesting topics, movies, news, programs. It is difficult for people to find others in common; starting a conversation, however, with a popular movies or musical band on the television could be a perfect approach to other people. I think television effects on everyone’s daily life, we can make it as an advantage to take a part into communities impacted by it.

Finally, television provides essential experiences from what viewers can learn. There are considerable number of channels that bring up educational programs which carefully censored and visualized for spectators to perceive. An instance from me is when I study oversea in Korea. I remember that I have watched a documentary program about this country - its culture, traditional, and manner. Hence, when I lived there, I did not feel confused; moreover, I easily harmonized to the sociality and had many friends in my dorm and classes. Furthermore, television was my best mate which helped me to understand Korean and how to speak with others in this country.

By way of conclusion, based on the arguments explored above, I am of the opinion that in most cases television is actually more beneficial for people to communicate with their friends and families. It is true to say that youth can adversely affected by television, however, parents should be responsible for guiding their children to use television properly.

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